I feel screwed over by my caulking this week.

Ok people, I would not call myself a handyman per say but I can do basic general maintenance and little projects like painting, laying down engineered hardwood and laminate flooring, put in new faucets, bathroom sinks and the like. As long as it's not overly complicated electrical rewiring or building a house, I'm pretty sure I can figure things out and manage when it comes to general home repairs. This is why I feel screwed over by my bathroom caulking experience of late.

I have not once, not twice but three times re-caulked my bathtub. I had a feeling when I first starting this caulking mini-project it was going to be a bit of a headache. Mind you that is mostly because I will not be able to use my shower for 36 hours and fear I would feel like a dirty, homeless bum. Actually it's worse, I fear I will smell like a dirty, homeless bum. When I went to Home Depot to buy caulking, this would be the first attempted caulking, one of the stupid orange smock wearing Home Depot helpers could not resist saying, “I know where you can get a good caulking”. Dude should seriously get fired for saying that. This was truly a sign that the caulking would go bad. And it did.

I have to admit, the first time I caulked the tub, I didn't follow the instructions to the tee. I only waited 26 hours and then had a shower. I thought this would be ok. Well it was not ok. All of the caulking bubbled and peeled off. So I waited 18 hours for the tub to dry and then re-caulked. I was feeling somewhat dirty and was in desperate need for a shower. But I knew the last time I screwed up by having a shower too soon. Instead, I was convinced having a non-splashy bath was the way to go. Wrong again. The caulking peeled off the next day. Screwed again!

So I think to myself, perhaps the tub was not completely dry when I caulked it so I used an electric heater to dry out the entire bathroom and rid of any and all moister I can possibly remove. I leave the heater on for 12 hours. I know everything in that bathroom was bone dry because of the heat. My toothpaste even felt warm and had melted into the consistency of Aunt Jamima's pancake syrup. I was almost positive that this time I had done a good caulking job. This time the caulking would be successful. The bathtub area was bone fucking dry and I let the caulking cure for 38 hours. They don't say “third time lucky” for nothing. I was convinced my caulking days were done. Well... I was wrong yet again! While I was showering today, the caulking peeled off for the third time. Fuck. Who knew I would despise caulk so very much. I am bitter and when I see caulking I want to spit at it.

So today I headed back to Home Depot, convinced I had purchased the wrong caulking and low and behold I had been using the WRONG CAULKING. Who knew there was such a thing as a bad caulking? Hmmm, now THAT sounded dirty. Anyway, I now have in my little hands a very good caulking with a silicone base. No more of that latex shit for me. I'm bring out the big guns now! So tonight I will dry out the bathroom again and put this new caulking to the test tomorrow. This new caulking better be worth it otherwise I vow to never caulk again!

Ninja Cat

I found this funny YouTube video and thought I'd share.... my cat could never be so stealth like... check it out: Ninja Cat

BC Fashion Week

I attended the gala opening of BC Fashion Week last night at the Chinese Cultural Centre in Chinatown. The runway show opened last night with local designer RozeMerie Cuevas' tribute to the 70's with boho chic dresses, cropped halter tops, jumpers and wide bottom pants for her new Spring 2009 Jacqueline Conior line. As always, the fabrics and designs were very feminine and beautiful. Also back by popular demand, RozeMerie designed some fabulously feminine and figure flattering suits for likes of the working professional women.



I'm sure the first thing that comes to mind before you attend a shin-dig like this is, "what am I going to wear?". It's funny because it seems every one's idea about what is fashionable is just so very different. There were women wearing very odd outfits in an attempt to be "haute-couture" I suppose. I saw all kinds last night. There was even one women dressed in serious 80's clothes. At first I thought it was a joke but it was not. She came styled in a crimped coif with teased power bangs and everything. For a moment I thought it was Fast-times at Ridgemont High. I guess not everyone can be a fashionista.


Other than the beautiful clothing at the show, the opportunity to sneak a glimpse into the world and culture of fashion is interesting to say the least. I have been a couple of these shows in past and well, I'm not sure if I'm suited to mingle among the likes of fashion divas and the superficial "I'm too chic for my sneaks" crowd. My sentiments were confirmed as we were escorted to the VIP area where we were amongst the who's who in Vancouver's fashion scene. Some were arrogant and there were others who just seem insincere. Not to say everyone was like that but there were a good handful. For me, it's nice to see the designs and experience a good fashion show, but I could do without the snobbery and the sense of elitism. I just don't roll like that. But on a positive note, I did manage to get some great photos. I'm going to try and add a slideshow feature to this blog so I don't have to upload 100+ photos on this particular post.

** Here's a link to an article on Vancouver.com where my photos are referenced: http://www.vancouver.com/get_article?article_id=144

WTF?

Who ever had this stamp made is a fucking genius! I want one!

Anyone who has ever worked in an office has probably dealt with some paperwork at some point or another. I know in my job, there is a lot of paperwork and I KNOW that is stamp would have been so very helpful in some jobs I have had in past.

I can see how this stamp would be very helpful for teachers as well. You get a student that submits homework that is a total piece of shit and you can send it back with this stamp. It's so much better than grading it as a "C-", "D" or even an "F". I love it. I think it would send a very clear message to the student that his/her effort (or lack there of) was complete crap and basically ungrade-able.

This stamp is so versatile that you could literally use it every day. Like when you are eating out and the bill comes and it's completely wrong. You call the server back and hand him/her the bill with the stamp.

I think I'm going to get myself one right NOW!

Purging My Life

Today was a day of purging. I'm still on a quest to rid of things I don't need. I'm not quite there yet but I'm getting there.

3 more bags of clothes and crap that I've kept for years and I have no idea why I had these things.

I don't even want to own that much furniture. Maybe it's just pure laziness. I simply don't want to move a lot of crap around. I hate moving as it is. Why make my life harder than it already is? Right? I mean really, how many t-shirts does one person really need? Shoes? Well shoes are different. I think a person can't have too many shoes. Call me Imelda but I thinks shoes can tell you a lot about a person. Shoes are a reflection of someone's personality.Old, worn and beat up shoes can tell you that a person is a) too lazy to go get new shoes, b) too cheap to get new shoes or c) maybe they are a little bit of are both.

My sister owns a hell of a lot of Aerosole shoes. They are somewhat stylish and, according to her, very comfortable. To me, her shoes tell me that her lifestyle revolves around comfort. That's the same reason she refuses to wear bras. They are too uncomfortable. If she feels any discomfort in her life, she is snappy, impatient and an all around super beeatch.

Even with all the purging I've been doing, I still have too much crap. I'm going to have to purge again tomorrow.

8 more days and I'm going to be in my new home. After almost a year of couch surfing, I have a new lease on life and it's friggin' GREAT.

A Culture of Impatience - I am an Impatient Asshole

Since being exactly 9 days into my new job at a media/technology company I’ve been thinking a lot about technology but more the pace of it. But before I start this “rant” of sorts, I’m going to bring you into Nancy’s thought process…

… at lunch today I had to run a handful of errands. I had to go to the bank, get a prophylactic (aka – phone condom or protective casing) for my iPhone, pick-up tickets and get some food for my gullet (which is uber important because I turn into a raging savage when I’m hungry – also known as a “Super Beeatch”). So I had a crap load of things to do in the time frame of 60 minutes or less.

I first head to the bank. There is a HUGE, motherf*cking lineup. I normally bank via the interwebs or via bank machine but my card is on the frits and I needed to talk to a real person to fix it. I wait for about five, maybe ten minutes. I think to myself, “I can’t waste my time waiting in this ridiculousness. Why on earth would a bank have only two tellers working during one of the busiest times??? - I will never know. And why banks charge a “service charge” for this kind of crap is beyond me.” I guesstimated it would take me over an hour to finally get some help. I look at the time and I leave. Time’s a tickin’…

I head over to the Apple store and check out a bunch of iPhone prophylactics. Some are nice but way too expensive for a piece of plastic or silicon. I debate whether I should by one. I quickly think about getting one for cheap at the Night Market or at some cell phone accessory kiosk. I then think, “shit Nancy you don’t have time to run around to do that! You’ll probably drop your phone and smash it to smithereens beforehand.” So I fork up the cash to buy what I think is very expensive hunk of plastic. I’m a sucker.

I now run to the Ticketmaster booth which happens to be in the food fair. I am hungry and getting grouchy. There are two people waiting in front of me. I look at the time and see that I only have 17 minutes before I have to get back to the office. I see the lady being helped is signing for tickets so I feel better knowing that she is almost done. One more dude in the lineup then it’s my turn! But when the dude gets to the counter he has a billion friggin’ questions about BC Lions tickets!!! OMG I was going to lose it! I think this partially has to do with the fact that my stomach was eating itself because I was ever so hungry. Besides that though, the guy was asking the most stupid questions I have ever heard. For example, “Do you know if I can get tickets somewhere else for cheaper?” or “If I spend more money on better tickets, do you think it will be worth it for me?”… but my favorite was “Where do you think all the hot chicks are sitting?” My patience was wear very thin at this point. I need to eat.

So while this moron in front of me is flirting with the saggy boobed ticket lady, I am debating on whether I should grab some tacos from the Taco Time right next door and hope that no one else jumps in the Ticketmaster line. I look over at Taco Time and there is virtually no lineup. But I then hear “OK, I’ll take the tickets here in the lower bowl.” Praise the Lord the man finally bought his tickets! So I decide to stay in line and get my tickets. I get my tickets and head over to the Taco Time but by now the lineup is HUGE. Damn! I am so hungry now I start to think like a cannibal. But miraculously a second cashier opens and I push people out of the way to get there. I order two hard shelled (I only like the hard shell because I think the soft ones taste like dough) beef tacos and mexi-fries to go. Mexi-fries are really just tater-tots but when dipped in hot sauce they become mexi-fries. Anyway… I now scramble to get back to work while trying to eat my lunch on the run. Of course, eating hard shelled tacos is very messy when you’re on the move. But I manage to pour on hot sauce and stuff every crumb and morsel of food into my mouth. My tummy thanks me for shutting up the growling. But of course all of this does not go without casualty. I manage to drip hot sauce all over my boob. Yup, a big, red, nasty stain. I looked like I was in a knife fight and my poor boob was the victim of the maiming.

So when I finally got back to the office, all I could think about was what an impatient asshole I was. I can’t imagine what I was like to the people behind the counters serving me. I must have been a complete dick. I think to myself, is this because I, as do others I’m sure, am used to things happening faster now a days? I know that if my web browser or any application on the computer does not respond instantaneously I click incessantly and lose my patience very quickly. Has our culture become one of instant gratification? Does everyone want things now? Where has our patience gone or did we really have patience in the first place? Were we just used to things being slower and simply accepted that we had to wait?

I have no answers to these questions. All I know is that I’m hungry again and need to eat before I gnaw off my own arm.

P.S. - on my way home from work, I go to London Drugs to pick up some toiletries and this lady at the checkout in front of me is paying in coins! ALL COINS! $11.34 worth of coins! I wanted to grab her little change purse and chuck it out the door! I am an asshole aren't I?

Krazy Glue and Smoking

Note to self: do not pack Krazy Glue in your toiletries bag if you are traveling by plane.

I am clearly an idiot because I thought it would be very efficient of me to take some Krazy glue with me to Calgary. I have some jewelry that needs a quick repair and a little Krazy glue should do the trick. Besides, I wanted to wear this pendant for a wedding this weekend but I didn't have time to carefully glue it back together before leaving Vancouver. Needless to say, the Krazy glue exploded in my toiletries bag and well everything is stuck together! Toothbrush, toothpaste, eye cream, nail clippers, tweezers, contact lens case, etc. all stuck together like white on rice! An Asian person would say "Aye-ya!" to that!


When I landed on Calgary, I waited for my girlfriend Aryn to pick me up. While I waited, I noticed some smokers getting twitchy for a cigarette. They must have come off a long international flight, either that or they're just hard core chain smokers. Anyhoodles, I watched these walking chimneys head over to the outside smoking area and I started laughing hysterically! Personally I think smoking is disgusting. Really. It's gross. We all know it's bad for your health - it makes you stinky, ages you ten fold (and no amount of anti-wrinkle cream will help your leathery catcher mitt like face), gives you bad breath, yellow teeth, yada, yada... not to mention it can kill you. Well it looks to me that the Calgary Airport Authority doesn't think much of smokers either because their designated smoking area is shared with the latrine of man's best friend. I actually feel sorry for the dogs there.