Moments of Truth

Men in Vancouver

2008-11-14T22:14:00.000-08:00

Recently I read a blog written by my friend's coworker about Vancouver Men a.k.a. Douche Bags. Now please bare in mind, this was written by a straight man (who also happens to be a Scotsman) and in some ways, I think he's got most Vancouver men dead-to-rights. He sums up most single men in Vancouver to what I refer to as "a man-child". Men who are ungrateful, selfish, rely on handouts from their parents and do not behave in any manner close to chivalrous. I think this is true of some, but not all men.

I suppose the same could be said of single women in Vancouver. Personally, and according to a handful of my male counterparts, I find a good majority of women in Vancouver are snobby, high maintenance, gold digging princesses. Mind you not all of us are like that. I am not any of these things although at times I do like to be a little bit of a princess... but only sometimes.

As a single women in my 30s, I think there are three very important things every women must always live by:

Always stand up for yourself. If you want something, speak up. If you don't want something, speak up. Having an informed opinion is a powerful thing so don't be ashamed of it.
Believe in yourself. Know you can achieve anything you put your mind to. You can do anything a man can do... even pee standing up if you want!
Have your own money. The days of relying on a man to support you are over or at least they should be. Women can contribute more than just in the kitchen, barefoot and preggers. Own your freedom.

So is chivalry dead because of Women's Lib and Women's Rights? Does the equality that women demand these days excuse men from acting like douche bags? I say HELL NO!

I appreciate it when a man opens the door for me or picks up the tab every once and a while. I don't expect it every time but it's very courteous and just simply nice. That doesn't mean that I wouldn't do the same.

I think some men these days are intimidated by strong women. And what I mean by strong woman is not a bitchy cunt but rather a woman who knows what she wants. What's wrong with a woman that knows what she wants? I think having goals and going after what you want is a good thing. That's what makes the world go round. So why is it that when a man knows what he wants he's seen as decisive and driven but when a women knows what she wants she's perceived to be a power hungry bitch?

Personally, I think it's hard for men to accept that women want more and are capable of more. Men are, by nature, hunter-gatherers and being able to provide is ingrained in their genetic make up. Just as women have a tendency take on the role of the homemaker and/or caregiver. There are some things in nature you can't simply undo. Men are men and women are women. We are not the same and we are not physically equal. Regardless, none of this is a good excuse for being ungentlemanlike or unladylike.

Men in Vancouver aren't a bunch of Douche Bags, they're just a bunch of pussies who can't man up to recognize and accept a good thing even if it hit them square between the eyes. So to all you pussy Vancouverite men out there, "Grow some balls!"

Germs & Congee

2008-11-07T15:15:00.000-08:00

I have a cold of some sort and I'm feeling a little bit crappy. I'm sneezing, coughing and I'm all stuffed up. I blame this on all the germs I probably pick up riding on the SkidTrain.... er I mean SkyTrain. Honestly, if people are sick, they need to quarantine themselves. Some level of self quarantine will reduce the spread of airborne bugs. With the way technology works these days, you can work from home and not get others on your commute and in your office sick.

I've been avoiding taking anything for this cold because I'm confident that my immune system can kick this bug sans drugs. I figure, I keep myself well hydrated and get plenty of rest and I should be back on my feet in no time! Of course one other part of that remedy is good ol' traditional congee. Now for those of you who are not familiar with congee, it's basically watered down, cooked rice.... a sort of rice soup/porridge. This is Asian comfort food. Much like chicken noodle soup is comfort to some of you white folk. I managed to peel myself out of bed to make Vietnamese style congee. And to my surprise I'd have to say, I did a pretty damn good job. *pat myself on the back* Deeee-lic-ous!

Well back to the movie watching and vegetating that will hopefully leave me well rested over the weekend.

Happy, happy, joy, joy.

The Right to Discriminate Against the Stupid

2008-10-24T21:28:00.000-07:00

*DISCLAIMER - The use of the word stupid is extremely excessive in this post. However, no other word would do justice.

I don't know if you would call what I'm writing about tonight a blog. It's more a rant. I'm feeling edgy and although I have been told that pointing the finger of blame is unproductive and wrong, I don't give a shit. I blame the wrongs of this world on stupid people. We are on the brink of a "world recession" because of stupid people and making stupid policies. Stupid people like George W. Bush. Stupid is as stupid does I guess. And hence those who voted for him are stupid. Those who voted him in for two terms are even more stupid.

I hate stupid drivers. I hate it when people can't park their cars properly. I especially hate it when that same stupid driver is in a brand new $95,000 car and can't drive or park. And it's not because I'm jealous they are shitty drivers in cars they don't deserve to drive. It's because they don't deserve to have a driver's licenses period. A menace to society really. If you see someone parking like an asshole, I recommend you download this infraction and leave it on their window. I figure it's either that or ship all stupid people off to stupid people island where they can fraternize among themselves.

I know "they" say there is no such thing as a stupid question. I beg to differ. If there are stupid people, there are bound to be stupid questions. Given that I believe 95% of the world is stupid (I'm being conservative with this number), the probability for stupid questions are extremely high. I would say 100% of stupid people ask a lot of stupid questions.

Stupid people are annoying. Not only do they ask stupid questions, they waste my time and waste clean and valuable air for the rest of the non-stupid.

You should always discriminate against the stupid. When someone says something stupid, be sure to let them know they are stupid. If someone does something stupid, take a photo to remind them of their stupidity. Hell, use the photo to mock them.

Jill's newest "man dilemma"

2008-10-16T00:01:00.000-07:00

This blog is for my good friend who we'll call "Jill". I consider Jill a close and dear friend. Jill, however, is unlucky when it comes to matters of the heart. There is nothing "wrong" with her. She is beautiful, intelligent, sweet and thoughtful. She is a person that would pamper a man and let him know that he is "king of the castle". So what's the problem? She often asks me why she has no luck with men. Don't get me wrong, she can get a date. In fact, there are a handful of guys out there pursuing her but she's simply not interested in those guys.

You see, I think one of the problems is that she tends to be attracted to guys who are unavailable; either emotionally (commitment-phobic) or physically unavailable (living somewhere other than Vancouver). The question is why? Let me get back to this point in a few paragraphs.

So, Jill has a new "man dilemma". She met a fellow about a month ago who is eight years young than her. She says that they have a lot of sexual chemistry and have fun when they spend time together. On her most recent birthday, the two of them exchanged a few steamy kisses and she thought that this would be the beginning of their dating future. Well, she was wrong. He, we'll call him "Jack", has a few hang ups and one major one is that he will not date his friend's relative. In this case, Jill is a cousin of one Jack's friends and he has told her that it is against his good judgment to date a friend's cousin. He simply will not pursue her because of that. Of course, Jill thinks this is just plain stupid.

Jill has since put herself out there and let Jack know that she wants to pursue something more than just a friendship. Jack is only interested in a platonic friendship.

Jill tells me that at this point in her life (she's in her early 30's), she has enough friends and doesn't really need more friends. She questions why should she pursue a friendship with him. I think this is a very interesting question.

First thing's first, friendships are by choice and never imposed. Friendships are about having a healthy balance between give and take. Actually that's the case for any relationship you have, whether a friendship, a best friend, a boyfriend/girlfriend or a husband/wife. Balance is essential for happiness. In your life people will come and go. Whatever relationships you have, it is important from time to time to ask yourself the following questions and to answer them honestly:

1) Ever since she/he came into my life, how has my life improved?

2) Am I a better person now than before?

3) How about my outlook on life? Has it been affected?

4) What habits have rubbed off on to me? Are they good? Bad? Have I started partying too much? Do I spend more? Have I acquired bad habits, etc?

5) What have I learned in this relationship? Anything new? Anything valuable?

6) What have I contributed to his/her life? What does he/she value about my friendship?

7) Is this relationship a "two-way" street?

Ok, so these questions are fairly intense. I know. But I think friendships are valuable and shouldn't be taken for granted. Personally, I think boyfriends/girlfriends can come and go but real friendships last a lifetime. True friends are the ones that are there for you when you feel your world is crashing down on you and they give you the support you need to get through it. No matter what happens, real friends are the ones you can count on. Everyone else is just an acquaintance or a jackass.

So after I ask Jill the questions you have just read, she decides to cut him loose. She does not see any value in pursuing a friendship.

Honestly, Jill if you are reading this... listen up, I think the real reason you don't want to pursue a friendship with him not because of the questions above but because you want to be more than "just friends". He rejected that idea and your ego is bruised. Frankly, I think if you two were dating, you'd eventually get bored of him anyway. With him, it's just the thrill of the chase. The fact is that he is mentally and emotionally too young for you. If you are honest with yourself, you want a something that will grow into a long-term relationship. And honey, this is not it.

So now, back to my initial question, why is Jill attracted to guys that are unavailable? It's the chase. There is no end game with these guys. She can't get bored of a guy she can't really get to know on a deeper level because he's simply not there. The "chase" is kept alive and well because you'll never catch him.

So my question for Jill is: Do you think you can get beyond the thrill of the chase?

If you answered yes, then maybe you should consider dating one of the guys pursuing you. If not then, "happy hunting".

I feel screwed over by my caulking this week.

2008-10-06T23:12:00.000-07:00

Ok people, I would not call myself a handyman per say but I can do basic general maintenance and little projects like painting, laying down engineered hardwood and laminate flooring, put in new faucets, bathroom sinks and the like. As long as it's not overly complicated electrical rewiring or building a house, I'm pretty sure I can figure things out and manage when it comes to general home repairs. This is why I feel screwed over by my bathroom caulking experience of late.

I have not once, not twice but three times re-caulked my bathtub. I had a feeling when I first starting this caulking mini-project it was going to be a bit of a headache. Mind you that is mostly because I will not be able to use my shower for 36 hours and fear I would feel like a dirty, homeless bum. Actually it's worse, I fear I will smell like a dirty, homeless bum. When I went to Home Depot to buy caulking, this would be the first attempted caulking, one of the stupid orange smock wearing Home Depot helpers could not resist saying, “I know where you can get a good caulking”. Dude should seriously get fired for saying that. This was truly a sign that the caulking would go bad. And it did.

I have to admit, the first time I caulked the tub, I didn't follow the instructions to the tee. I only waited 26 hours and then had a shower. I thought this would be ok. Well it was not ok. All of the caulking bubbled and peeled off. So I waited 18 hours for the tub to dry and then re-caulked. I was feeling somewhat dirty and was in desperate need for a shower. But I knew the last time I screwed up by having a shower too soon. Instead, I was convinced having a non-splashy bath was the way to go. Wrong again. The caulking peeled off the next day. Screwed again!

So I think to myself, perhaps the tub was not completely dry when I caulked it so I used an electric heater to dry out the entire bathroom and rid of any and all moister I can possibly remove. I leave the heater on for 12 hours. I know everything in that bathroom was bone dry because of the heat. My toothpaste even felt warm and had melted into the consistency of Aunt Jamima's pancake syrup. I was almost positive that this time I had done a good caulking job. This time the caulking would be successful. The bathtub area was bone fucking dry and I let the caulking cure for 38 hours. They don't say “third time lucky” for nothing. I was convinced my caulking days were done. Well... I was wrong yet again! While I was showering today, the caulking peeled off for the third time. Fuck. Who knew I would despise caulk so very much. I am bitter and when I see caulking I want to spit at it.

So today I headed back to Home Depot, convinced I had purchased the wrong caulking and low and behold I had been using the WRONG CAULKING. Who knew there was such a thing as a bad caulking? Hmmm, now THAT sounded dirty. Anyway, I now have in my little hands a very good caulking with a silicone base. No more of that latex shit for me. I'm bring out the big guns now! So tonight I will dry out the bathroom again and put this new caulking to the test tomorrow. This new caulking better be worth it otherwise I vow to never caulk again!

Ninja Cat

2008-09-26T16:01:00.000-07:00

I found this funny YouTube video and thought I'd share.... my cat could never be so stealth like... check it out: Ninja Cat

BC Fashion Week

2008-09-23T10:02:00.000-07:00

I attended the gala opening of BC Fashion Week last night at the Chinese Cultural Centre in Chinatown. The runway show opened last night with local designer RozeMerie Cuevas' tribute to the 70's with boho chic dresses, cropped halter tops, jumpers and wide bottom pants for her new Spring 2009 Jacqueline Conior line. As always, the fabrics and designs were very feminine and beautiful. Also back by popular demand, RozeMerie designed some fabulously feminine and figure flattering suits for likes of the working professional women.

I'm sure the first thing that comes to mind before you attend a shin-dig like this is, "what am I going to wear?". It's funny because it seems every one's idea about what is fashionable is just so very different. There were women wearing very odd outfits in an attempt to be "haute-couture" I suppose. I saw all kinds last night. There was even one women dressed in serious 80's clothes. At first I thought it was a joke but it was not. She came styled in a crimped coif with teased power bangs and everything. For a moment I thought it was Fast-times at Ridgemont High. I guess not everyone can be a fashionista.

Other than the beautiful clothing at the show, the opportunity to sneak a glimpse into the world and culture of fashion is interesting to say the least. I have been a couple of these shows in past and well, I'm not sure if I'm suited to mingle among the likes of fashion divas and the superficial "I'm too chic for my sneaks" crowd. My sentiments were confirmed as we were escorted to the VIP area where we were amongst the who's who in Vancouver's fashion scene. Some were arrogant and there were others who just seem insincere. Not to say everyone was like that but there were a good handful. For me, it's nice to see the designs and experience a good fashion show, but I could do without the snobbery and the sense of elitism. I just don't roll like that. But on a positive note, I did manage to get some great photos. I'm going to try and add a slideshow feature to this blog so I don't have to upload 100+ photos on this particular post.

** Here's a link to an article on Vancouver.com where my photos are referenced: http://www.vancouver.com/get_article?article_id=144

WTF?

2008-09-10T09:30:00.001-07:00

Who ever had this stamp made is a fucking genius! I want one!

Anyone who has ever worked in an office has probably dealt with some paperwork at some point or another. I know in my job, there is a lot of paperwork and I KNOW that is stamp would have been so very helpful in some jobs I have had in past.

I can see how this stamp would be very helpful for teachers as well. You get a student that submits homework that is a total piece of shit and you can send it back with this stamp. It's so much better than grading it as a "C-", "D" or even an "F". I love it. I think it would send a very clear message to the student that his/her effort (or lack there of) was complete crap and basically ungrade-able.

This stamp is so versatile that you could literally use it every day. Like when you are eating out and the bill comes and it's completely wrong. You call the server back and hand him/her the bill with the stamp.

I think I'm going to get myself one right NOW!

Purging My Life

2008-08-23T21:51:00.000-07:00

Today was a day of purging. I'm still on a quest to rid of things I don't need. I'm not quite there yet but I'm getting there.

3 more bags of clothes and crap that I've kept for years and I have no idea why I had these things.

I don't even want to own that much furniture. Maybe it's just pure laziness. I simply don't want to move a lot of crap around. I hate moving as it is. Why make my life harder than it already is? Right? I mean really, how many t-shirts does one person really need? Shoes? Well shoes are different. I think a person can't have too many shoes. Call me Imelda but I thinks shoes can tell you a lot about a person. Shoes are a reflection of someone's personality.Old, worn and beat up shoes can tell you that a person is a) too lazy to go get new shoes, b) too cheap to get new shoes or c) maybe they are a little bit of are both.

My sister owns a hell of a lot of Aerosole shoes. They are somewhat stylish and, according to her, very comfortable. To me, her shoes tell me that her lifestyle revolves around comfort. That's the same reason she refuses to wear bras. They are too uncomfortable. If she feels any discomfort in her life, she is snappy, impatient and an all around super beeatch.

Even with all the purging I've been doing, I still have too much crap. I'm going to have to purge again tomorrow.

8 more days and I'm going to be in my new home. After almost a year of couch surfing, I have a new lease on life and it's friggin' GREAT.

A Culture of Impatience - I am an Impatient Asshole

2008-08-21T19:13:00.000-07:00

Since being exactly 9 days into my new job at a media/technology company I’ve been thinking a lot about technology but more the pace of it. But before I start this “rant” of sorts, I’m going to bring you into Nancy’s thought process…

… at lunch today I had to run a handful of errands. I had to go to the bank, get a prophylactic (aka – phone condom or protective casing) for my iPhone, pick-up tickets and get some food for my gullet (which is uber important because I turn into a raging savage when I’m hungry – also known as a “Super Beeatch”). So I had a crap load of things to do in the time frame of 60 minutes or less.

I first head to the bank. There is a HUGE, motherf*cking lineup. I normally bank via the interwebs or via bank machine but my card is on the frits and I needed to talk to a real person to fix it. I wait for about five, maybe ten minutes. I think to myself, “I can’t waste my time waiting in this ridiculousness. Why on earth would a bank have only two tellers working during one of the busiest times??? - I will never know. And why banks charge a “service charge” for this kind of crap is beyond me.” I guesstimated it would take me over an hour to finally get some help. I look at the time and I leave. Time’s a tickin’…

I head over to the Apple store and check out a bunch of iPhone prophylactics. Some are nice but way too expensive for a piece of plastic or silicon. I debate whether I should by one. I quickly think about getting one for cheap at the Night Market or at some cell phone accessory kiosk. I then think, “shit Nancy you don’t have time to run around to do that! You’ll probably drop your phone and smash it to smithereens beforehand.” So I fork up the cash to buy what I think is very expensive hunk of plastic. I’m a sucker.

I now run to the Ticketmaster booth which happens to be in the food fair. I am hungry and getting grouchy. There are two people waiting in front of me. I look at the time and see that I only have 17 minutes before I have to get back to the office. I see the lady being helped is signing for tickets so I feel better knowing that she is almost done. One more dude in the lineup then it’s my turn! But when the dude gets to the counter he has a billion friggin’ questions about BC Lions tickets!!! OMG I was going to lose it! I think this partially has to do with the fact that my stomach was eating itself because I was ever so hungry. Besides that though, the guy was asking the most stupid questions I have ever heard. For example, “Do you know if I can get tickets somewhere else for cheaper?” or “If I spend more money on better tickets, do you think it will be worth it for me?”… but my favorite was “Where do you think all the hot chicks are sitting?” My patience was wear very thin at this point. I need to eat.

So while this moron in front of me is flirting with the saggy boobed ticket lady, I am debating on whether I should grab some tacos from the Taco Time right next door and hope that no one else jumps in the Ticketmaster line. I look over at Taco Time and there is virtually no lineup. But I then hear “OK, I’ll take the tickets here in the lower bowl.” Praise the Lord the man finally bought his tickets! So I decide to stay in line and get my tickets. I get my tickets and head over to the Taco Time but by now the lineup is HUGE. Damn! I am so hungry now I start to think like a cannibal. But miraculously a second cashier opens and I push people out of the way to get there. I order two hard shelled (I only like the hard shell because I think the soft ones taste like dough) beef tacos and mexi-fries to go. Mexi-fries are really just tater-tots but when dipped in hot sauce they become mexi-fries. Anyway… I now scramble to get back to work while trying to eat my lunch on the run. Of course, eating hard shelled tacos is very messy when you’re on the move. But I manage to pour on hot sauce and stuff every crumb and morsel of food into my mouth. My tummy thanks me for shutting up the growling. But of course all of this does not go without casualty. I manage to drip hot sauce all over my boob. Yup, a big, red, nasty stain. I looked like I was in a knife fight and my poor boob was the victim of the maiming.

So when I finally got back to the office, all I could think about was what an impatient asshole I was. I can’t imagine what I was like to the people behind the counters serving me. I must have been a complete dick. I think to myself, is this because I, as do others I’m sure, am used to things happening faster now a days? I know that if my web browser or any application on the computer does not respond instantaneously I click incessantly and lose my patience very quickly. Has our culture become one of instant gratification? Does everyone want things now? Where has our patience gone or did we really have patience in the first place? Were we just used to things being slower and simply accepted that we had to wait?

I have no answers to these questions. All I know is that I’m hungry again and need to eat before I gnaw off my own arm.

P.S. - on my way home from work, I go to London Drugs to pick up some toiletries and this lady at the checkout in front of me is paying in coins! ALL COINS! $11.34 worth of coins! I wanted to grab her little change purse and chuck it out the door! I am an asshole aren't I?

Krazy Glue and Smoking

2008-07-17T22:39:00.000-07:00

Note to self: do not pack Krazy Glue in your toiletries bag if you are traveling by plane.

I am clearly an idiot because I thought it would be very efficient of me to take some Krazy glue with me to Calgary. I have some jewelry that needs a quick repair and a little Krazy glue should do the trick. Besides, I wanted to wear this pendant for a wedding this weekend but I didn't have time to carefully glue it back together before leaving Vancouver. Needless to say, the Krazy glue exploded in my toiletries bag and well everything is stuck together! Toothbrush, toothpaste, eye cream, nail clippers, tweezers, contact lens case, etc. all stuck together like white on rice! An Asian person would say "Aye-ya!" to that!

When I landed on Calgary, I waited for my girlfriend Aryn to pick me up. While I waited, I noticed some smokers getting twitchy for a cigarette. They must have come off a long international flight, either that or they're just hard core chain smokers. Anyhoodles, I watched these walking chimneys head over to the outside smoking area and I started laughing hysterically! Personally I think smoking is disgusting. Really. It's gross. We all know it's bad for your health - it makes you stinky, ages you ten fold (and no amount of anti-wrinkle cream will help your leathery catcher mitt like face), gives you bad breath, yellow teeth, yada, yada... not to mention it can kill you. Well it looks to me that the Calgary Airport Authority doesn't think much of smokers either because their designated smoking area is shared with the latrine of man's best friend. I actually feel sorry for the dogs there.

Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon: Brew Pub Style

2008-06-19T00:30:00.001-07:00

When people use the expression “small world”, I now believe it to be true. It’s not that I didn’t believe it before. Many times when I have spent time with friends, acquaintances, co-workers, etc. we find out that we have mutual friends or acquaintances in common. I’m sure this experience is not uncommon and these sort of things happen more often than we think. However, one recent Saturday night in Yaletown takes the cake for my “Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon” encounter.

Let’s start from the beginning of the night shall we??? My friend Deanna and I started the evening off hanging out at her place having our trusty Gin and Sodas shooting the shit. Even though her defective “Made in China” hair dryer literally singed chunks of hair from the top of my head (seriously, I lost enough hair that it resembled a small animal in her waste basket!), we were have a good time and laughing our asses off. At some point we thought we should head out some where and be a little social… so off to the Yaletown Brew Pub we went!

When we arrived at the Brew Pub I had an itching to play some pool. Deanna, on the other hand, declared her dismal pool handicap and I had to find someone else to play with. There were a couple of guys playing the table and they came across as a couple of “dudes” who thought their “shit don’t stink” if you know what I mean. Picture this: They were dressed in white, un-tucked, button up shirts with jeans and white shoes resembling Diesel sneakers and the like. Apparently there was a group of them out on a Stag, dressed in white and they called themselves “The White Knights” - how gay is that????

Nonetheless, I wanted to play a round, even if there were fools at the table. So I immediately put my twoonie on the edge of the pool table to hold my spot. Besides, I was feeling confident that I could kick at least one of their asses off the pool table. Apparently a little bit of gin in my system and I think I can make miracles happen. Anyhow, these jack-asses somehow convince me to play doubles with their buddy Shane. I reluctantly agree and we play. Fortunately, I was on my game and Shane and I won the first round! We continue to play another game when a couple of other ladies come by the table. We all stop for a small chat and introduce ourselves. One of the ladies introduces herself to me as “Zilya” and I immediately ask her “Did you used to be married to Travis?”.

Zilya smiles but looks at me puzzled as I say “I’m Nancy. I’m a friend of Simon’s”.

Zilya grins and says to me, “You’re the one with the Ninja!” We both laughed.

And that was the beginning of my world becoming smaller. As the night went on, I find out Zilya’s friend Sarah works with a friend of my sister’s, Linda, whom she will be the maid of honor at her wedding in a few weeks.

I later run in to a guy I went to school with named Cam. I also run into my friend Karen who happened to also be there with a few of her co-worker/friends. It turns out one of Karen’s friends went to high school with Cam. Anyhow… to try and simplify this Yaletown “small world” social network ordeal, I have included a diagram to illustrate the bizarre experience.

The bubbles in “blue” are the people who were actually at the Brew Pub that night. Those in “yellow” were not there but were the connection between the groups of people. Craziness!

So the moral to this story is: Don’t burn your bridges; especially not in this city because it may come back to bite you. Vancouver is a small city and it seems everyone knows everyone. Well, at least they did in Yaletown this one Saturday night!

Advice for Single Ladies

2008-06-08T09:53:00.000-07:00

To my single girlfriends: Some dating advice to those of you who relate to shopping.

Think of dating like shopping.
You can window shop if you are not ready to buy. However, keep in mind that wandering the stores can get tiring so you will eventually have to buy something. Besides, if you just keep looking and not try anything on for size, when you finally do decide, your merchandise may already be sold.
Try things on for size. You won't know what you like and don't like unless you give it try. Look at things like fit; is it flattering or does it make your butt look big? Maybe you are just looking for accessories and not a whole outfit. Does it compliment you and bring out your personality? You won't know until you try it.
When you are ready to buy, make sure there is a good return policy just in case you change your mind or if the merchandise is defective.... and we all know that there is a lot of defective merchandise out there! - too many things made in China these days (just kidding - that would be my bad sense of humour).
Remember that store credit is a load of crap. Merchandise attached to this sort of return policy is just around to mess with your head. If you can't take it back, just ditch it. Give it away to someone more in need.

Did that make sense? I think it's perfectly logical :)

ATV in Mexico

2008-04-09T15:03:00.000-07:00

Senga and I thought we should try and get off the beat ‘n path and do something fun so we decided to rent an ATV and take a trail into the jungle. It’s the dry season so the riverbeds we travelled along were mostly dried up and there was a hell of a lot of dirt and dust! The ATV trail was pretty fun! Good terrain with steep areas and some rough patches to manoeuvre around. I drove the ATV as Senga’s wrist was sore. She kept saying to me that this was an exercise in trust for her. Mostly because I didn’t believe in using the brakes when we were going down the hills. She kept saying to me “Nancy, brakes are our friends!” as I barreled down the hills. She will fully admit that she has some control issues so being a passenger while I was driving like a maniac probably didn’t help. Never have never I lost such blood circulation in my arms and legs from someone hanging on so, so very tightly! It was like someone gripping on to a thigh-master!

Here are some photos of where we arrived... at a river bed in the jungle. There were a whole lot of lizards, vultures and a few donkeys around… and a little puppy we ran into after the tour.

Photo Blog - Huatulco

2008-04-09T14:10:00.000-07:00

So for this blog I've decided to post a bunch of photos instead of writing a lot of crap.

Turtles

Sunrise

Some Photos before Dinner

Huatulco, Oaxaca

2008-04-09T13:19:00.000-07:00

Las Brisas Resort Huatulco is a beautiful property! Apparently it used to be a Club Med. It’s much, MUCH better than the flight. I mean what could be better than toilets that work! The resort is very lush and green with well kept tropical gardens. I would venture to say that it feels like a tame jungle. Very beautiful!

The photo is the view from our room.

Huatulco is in the state of Oaxaca and situated 286 kilometres from the colonel capital of Oaxaca city. The bays of Huatulco are located along the coast at the end of the southern Sierra Madre mountains. The clear, turquoise water of the 36 beaches are spectacular! Over11,000 acres in and around Huatulco were declared national parks by the Mexican government in 1998. Important to sustaining the natural ecology and sea life, many of the bays are considered protected areas with development prohibited. Some of the bays are also the spawning grounds for variety of marine (sea) turtles.

The state of Oaxaca, among Mexico's 31 states, is known for its diverse culture with 16 different ethic groups. As such, Oaxacan culture combines the history of many of these groups. The native tribes ruled by the Aztecs in the city's earliest years were the Zapotec and the Mixtec. Both tribes still influence Oaxaca culture to this day, and the informed traveler will note that separate accents representing these different tribes can still be heard in Oaxaca today. Spain and colonialists from Europe also influence Oaxaca culture. Together, this mix of cultures and peoples creates a modern day Oaxaca that is full of history and fascinating people and traditions.

Nowhere are the differing sides of Oaxaca culture seen as prominently as they are in Oaxaca food. Oaxaca food is famous throughout the world for its unique flair and combination of spices that are found almost nowhere else in Mexico.

Senga and I signed up for a few low key tours. Here are some photos from a natural, fresh water lagoon and crocodile habitat! We also went on a snorkeling trip visiting 7 bays.

Flight to Huatulco

2008-04-09T12:48:00.000-07:00

My friend Senga and I went on a week long, girl's vacation to Huatulco, Mexico!I guess it’s pretty standard for vacation travel to start at an ungodly hour. However, I can understand why. People want to start their vacations ASAP. My flight to Huatulco departed this morning at 6:30 am. The airlines recommend you arrive at the airport 3 hours before your departure time. There is no way in hell I was going to be at the airport at 3:30 am. I’m sure the security line up would not be an issue before the break of dawn. I arrived at the airport to 4:45 am and that was plenty of time to check-in, eat breakfast, get a snack, and grab a magazine to read on the plane. I even had a mini nap before boarding.

As some of you may already know, business travel and leisure travel vastly differ. For this trip, I’m flying on Sunwings, a charter flight, and service sucks hole. However, I think that is to be expected so I can’t say that I am disappointed. Typically, if the service is good on these charters, I am pleasantly surprised. I think the flight attendants are the rejects from all the other non-charter airlines. Even the safety demo seemed ghetto to me some how. They were using old, crusty belt buckles and faded yellow and somewhat smelly looking, plastic air masks. You know when clear plastic tubes have yellowed and the plastic that is supposed to be soft is hard and brittle? That’s what the air mask looked like. The elastic used to hold the mask to your face was tattered and worn. The elastic strap is supposed to be white but this demo one had a brown tinge to it. Nasty.

Here is the extent of the mediocre service from Sunwings:

a) There were only working toilet in the back of the plane. Hello people, this is vacation so the passengers are boozing away and low and behold there is now a long, long queue to wait in to deplete oneself. Holy-mama-jamma was the line up long! At times I’d say the line up was 15 people deep. Multiply 15 people by 3 minutes per person (I think that is being conservative!) and you have a 45 minute bathroom line-up! Good thing I elected to sleep during most of the flight and watch my downloaded TV shows on my lap top.

b) Because of the long queue down the isle of the plane, the flight attendants had a hard time serving meals. Needless to say, Senga and I didn't get a meal until we managed to waive one of them down to let them know they missed us in the food service. I'm sure someone spat a loogie in my already awful plane food. I am now certain something was wrong with our food because Senga became violently ill one we got off the plane. She pretty much up-chucked her entire lunch in the airport bathroom.

c) Also because of the bathroom issue, passengers who wanted to get drinks (water, juice, beer and whatever else) had to walk to the galley to get their own drinks. The toilet queue blocked the isle so drink carts could not be used.

My hope was the resort would be much better than our flight to Mexico. I plan on some solid rest and relaxation in addition to becoming a darker race! Hellllooooo sunshine, here we come!

Travelling Efficiently, Connecting Flights and Pee

2008-02-24T21:31:00.000-08:00

Well this last trip to Montreal will be the last leg of my work travels that began in early January. While it has been a great experience to travel to almost all of the Davis offices, it has also been quite tiresome. I know that there are many people in this world who travel extensively for work or maybe even for pleasure. So my recent travels likely pale in comparison to some. One thing I have learned traveling these past couple of months is that I know I can travel light. I have learned how to pack efficiently. I have also come to realize that I don’t need to have a lot of “stuff” when I travel. Nor do I need a lot of “stuff” period. So after my trip back from Whitehorse, I took on the task of cleaning out my closet. I know I have a lot clothes and I have always been one who likes having unique and stylish clothing. But I know that I can still have a sense of style without so much “stuff”. I simply do not need all these things. I have donated 4 garbage bags of clothes and shoes. I will likely give away more when I get back home.

Efficiency and Connecting Flights

My flight this morning had a connection through Calgary and typically I hate having to catch connecting flights. I hate connecting flights for the following reasons, a) they are time consuming and I prefer using my time efficiently, b) I hate the possibility of missing a connection hence wasting more time waiting around trying to get to my final destination and c) I often feel a need to stop in the washroom to pee when I get off the plane. I know that c) is a ridiculous reason to hate connecting flights. I think I have been classically conditioned to feel the need to pee after I get off a plane. So you ask why does having the need to pee have anything to do with hating connecting flights? Well, if I have a very close connect time between flights, typically anything under an hour, I worry that my need to pee could make me miss my flight. I am obviously a control freak. What can I say?... I’m a Virgo.

Adding to my theme of efficiency, not only can you check-in on-line but Air Canada, amongst other airlines, can send you your boarding pass by way of a text message! It’s great and there’s no need to use a stitch of paper! Since I have learned to travel lightly, by bringing a carry-on bag, checking in on-line, and getting to the airport in just enough time to clear security, I can arrive at the gate and board a flight without having to wait. I hate waiting around and I find this system for travel unbelievably efficient. I love it when things tick like clock work! Now if only we were allowed to verify photo identification without actually having an ID card, the efficiency travel process would be complete. I know there is such technology available but given the debate surrounding privacy, I can understand the hesitation to implement. But a have a good reason why I would consider a retina and/or finger print scan and that has to do with a dirty toilet.

The Need to Pee

From what I’ve told you so far I gather you get that I am all about efficiency. I like to plan and be prepared. I even put much thought into what I will wear on the plane in order to ensure comfort on the plane, comfort during any connections if applicable, and I take into consideration the weather condition at my arrival destination. And in doing so, I always make sure I am wearing pants with back pockets. When I can, I often opt to wear my jeans as long as I don’t have to go directly to the office from the airport. The pockets are for my driver’s licence or my passport. So before boarding a flight, I have my Blackberry for my e-boarding pass in one back pocket and ID in the other. Well today something went terribly wrong during my connection in Calgary.

As I got off my connecting flight into Calgary, I, of course, have the incredible need to pee. The flight coming into to Calgary was late so my one-hour time frame to connect shortened to about 25 minutes. So I quickly drag my little carry-on bag with me to the bathroom. Of course, I’m about to burst and the toilet stalls are so small I can barely fit my bag in with me in the stall. At this point I didn’t care if the stall door was opened or not. I had to pee like there was no tomorrow and when I did, it sounded like a cow peeing on a flat rock. What a relief. I can now rush back to find my gate. At this point, I probably have about 10 or 15 minutes before the flight takes off. Well upon finishing relieving myself, I pull up my jeans and to my misfortune, my ID slips out of my back pocket…. hits the edge of the toilet seat and (it seemed to be happening in slow motion) jumps into the bowl full of my own pee! Aghhhhh! I am grossed out.

Now, if photo identification was not needed to board the plane, I would have simply walked away. Cards can be replaced! But I needed this stupid piece of plastic so what else could I do but reach into the bowl and get my driver’s licence. Now, it was very important that I did this in a calm and controlled manner. The last thing I needed to do was reach in and in a panic, accidentally splash around urine! My luck would have it that I would likely scream and flick pee into my mouth! Ughhhh! Hence, I am pro retina and/or finger print scan as a means of identification.

Mushing and Sourdough Sam in Whitehorse

2008-02-18T22:53:00.000-08:00

What can I tell you all about Whitehorse other than it is definitely a friendly town. My co-worker Dean and I seemed to have arrived during the week of the 22^nd anniversary of the Sourdough Sam Contest during Rendezvous: A Wild Week in Whitehorse. So you are probably asking yourself “What is the Sourdough Sam?” Well apparently “Sams” are local male contestants that compete for 7 straight evenings in a wide variety of hilarious events like evening gown and bikini contests, karaoke, a kolbassa eating contest, turkey bowling, a dance fever night and the male strip tease. The audience votes for a winner each evening and at the end of the 7 days, points are tabulated and the person with the most points wins a truck. Not a new truck, just one that runs. There are also Can-can girls at these events.

Other interesting facts about Whitehorse:

If you raise your kids in Whitehorse, they have the option to go on a Bison Hunt starting at age 12. Your kid(s) will have a great week long experience of hunting for bison with their classmates. Your children are permitted to use guns. You don’t even have to sign a waiver! Permission slips will work just fine.

A newcomer to Whitehorse is called a "Cheechako". The word comes from "new comer" in Chinook jargon, a trader language in the late 1800's and early 1900's that incorporated English and the language of the Chinook First Nation. The term Cheechako was prevalent all along the West Coast during the Gold Rush. When new people came off the boats in Skagway on their way to the gold fields, local traders who had been in-country for decades called them "Cheechakos".

A local who has spent some length of time in Whitehorse is called a Sourdough. I’m told that this terms comes from a famous Robert Service poem about the cremation of a prospector who freezes to death in the Yukon called "The Cremation of Sam McGee", published in 1907 in The Songs of a Sourdough (The Spell of the Yukon and Other Verses).

This February is the 25^th Running of the Yukon Quest International Dog Sledding Race. It is a 1,020 mile race that runs from Fairbanks, Alaska to Whitehorse, Yukon Territory. A single musher and a team of 12 to 14 sled dogs race for 10 to 14 days, following the historic 1890's Klondike Gold Rush and river mail delivery routes. The race route runs on frozen rivers, across open water and bad ice, over top four mountain ranges, reaching an elevation of 3,800 feet where temperatures can drop to as low as −40 to −60 °C with winds reaching 160 km/h on the mountain summits. The Yukon Quest is 'The Toughest Sled Dog Race in the World'.

Bueller??? Bueller…??? Anyone??? Anyone???

Graham Lang, an Articling Student at Davis LLP where I work, is the Ferris Bueller of Whitehorse. When my co-worker Dean and I arrived in Whitehorse, we decided to see what all the ruckus was all about in the bar next door to the restaurant we had dinner. If you can believe it, there was a Vancouver-like “bar line-up” at Coasters Bar and Grill. I couldn’t believe that Dean and I were waiting in a line-up to get in to the bar in Whitehorse! Well it turns out that Coasters was hosting a Sourdough Sam event. The people watching at Coasters was the primary reason we decided to line up to get in because there were all kinds inside. Such a wide variety and mish-mash of people in one bar. You would never see anything like this in Vancouver. Fortunately the line moved quickly. Anyway… once inside I thought I recognized someone but I couldn’t put my finger on where I knew this person from. I mean really, who would I know in Whitehorse? And then suddenly it hit me… it could bet money that the guy I recognized is Graham Lang! But of course I did not “know” Graham other than from reading a couple of his stories he had posted on the firm’s intranet about his experience working as an Articling Student at the Whitehorse office. Along with the stories were photographs he had posted. This is where I “knew” Graham from and this is how I recognized his face. Anyhow, I decided to ask this fellow if his name was Graham. This is how the conversation went… and keep in mind that we are in a bar with loud techno music and where many drinks had been had by all parties involved in this conversation:

Nancy: (walks over to Graham and friends and taps in on the shoulder)

Graham: (looks around, and then looks down - I am short so he has to look down)

Nancy: “Is your name Graham?” (pause)

Graham: “Ummm, yes.” (looks confused)

Nancy: “Graham Lang?” (pause)

Graham: “Ummm, yes?” (looks worried like he’s in some sort of trouble)

At this point I think he thought that perhaps he owed me or someone he knew some money. Either that or I was about to serve him with some papers or tell him about some love child he had had years ago. Anyhow, throughout the rest of the weekend any where we went in town with Graham everyone seemed to know him! Graham is a very friendly and funny guy. The overall impression we got was that Graham is the Ferris Bueller of Whitehorse.

Dog Mushing

I tried my hand in some dog sledding while up here in Whitehorse. Of course, it was nothing remotely close to what a musher would experience running the Yukon Quest. I did however have the good fortune of having Rudy, a retired Quest dog, in my little team of 6 dogs. Not much to talk about here except that I love the outdoors and sledding with some great puppies… well other than pooping. Most of you who know me know that I am anti-poo. The dogs did a lot of pooping while in a full run. I can’t really describe what it was like to smell it but I have attached a few video clips for you to view. I think I gagged the first time it happened... but I had stopped gagging when I shot this video clip.

Calgary Hotel Break-In

2008-01-21T22:31:00.000-08:00

I arrived in Calgary on Tuesday night and I am thrilled that it is a balmy -10c! Now, business travel is typical bland and boring. More often than not, nothing overly exciting happens when I travel for work. Sometimes, I will go to dinner with my counterparts at the other office or have a business dinner with counterparts at competing firms. It’s mostly shop talk with the occasional polite questions about how your family is doing and the like.

Well during my visit to Calgary, I decided not to have such dinners. I was looking forward to spending some down time on my own. One night I wanted to find a few new books to read so I headed up to 8^th Avenue to a quaint bookstore called McNally Robinson Booksellers. The store is nice with a café upstairs. I was delighted that I could leaf through a few books while having a nice, quiet dinner. After my enjoyable meal of sun dried tomato and pesto tortellini, I purchase my books and start walking back to the hotel about 8 or 9 blocks away.

Accompanying me on my walk is my trusty Blackberry mp3 player. I love listening to music while I wander around. Good tunes always make things much more pleasant and enjoyable for me. As I strolled through the streets of downtown Calgary I was completely and elatedly enthralled with the music that I am certain I was singing out loud, and likely singing badly. I didn’t care… I was enjoying myself and I didn’t care who knew it.

I continued to trot along until I arrived at my hotel. Needless to say, I was still in a great mood and listening to music very loudly on my headphones. At this point the music has been so stimulating that I am pretty much strutting! I strut into the hotel and gleefully dance to the elevator heading back to my room. I am looking forward to delving into my newly purchased books. I will tell you more about my book selection in my next blog because I am truly disgusted and disappointed with myself. Anyway, I get off the elevator and skip down the long hallway still entrenched in the music playing between my ears. I pull out my keycard to open the room door. Nothing happens. I try the keycard again and the door does not open. I quickly wipe the magnetic strip on the back of the card onto my jeans in hopes that it was a bit a dust or something. But no, the key doesn’t seem to be working. Of course, I am still enjoying the music playing loudly from my mp3 player and I’m not at all frustrated by the fact that I can’t get the door open to my room. Like a fool, I must have been standing the for a good 30 seconds cramming the keycard into the keyslot and wrenching on the door handle while pushing on the door.

All of a sudden, the door swings open and there is sweaty man standing in my room wearing a bathrobe looking somewhat tired and perturbed! I was so startled that I let out a little scream! I think my scream scared him. My first thought was “who the hell are you and why are in my room?!?” Well, it turned out this was NOT my room. The man said to me in an annoyed tone “I kept asking who was at the door and you didn’t answer.” Of course I didn’t answer, music from my mp3 player was playing way to loudly for me to hear anything! At this point all I could do was laugh. I literally laughed out loud and apologized profusely to him. Even though I had a huge grin on my face as I walk to my room giggling to myself, I was truly sorry I had interrupt his Thursday evening. My room was at the opposite end of the hallway. I turned the wrong way when I got of the elevator. How embarrassing.

Wrapping up Yellowknife and Off to Calgary

2008-01-21T22:15:00.000-08:00

On my last day in Yellowknife I had the pleasure of experiencing -42c weather and seeing snow actually blowing upwards! It was great! In the morning, the walk to the office is a mere 5 or 6 blocks but in this kind of weather it has it’s challenges; especially for a mild weather dwelling Vancouverite like me. As usual, I bundled up in wool long johns, layered myself in thermal sweaters and such. This particular morning, I had decided to wear my glasses instead of cramming my contact lenses into my dryballs… err I mean eyeballs. This was my first mistake. It’s a mistake because I forgot about my need to breathe. Let me explain further…

As we walked out into the cold to trek to the office, I pulled up my neck dickie up to cover my face from the wind and cold. Of course, need to do this thing called breathing. Apparently, it’s the thing that separates the living from the dead. Anywhooo… because I have this need to breathe, each breath I took steamed up my glasses. I tried to breathe less intensely taking short breaths. That did not help. My glasses continued to steam both on the inside and the outside of the lens. Of course, it being -42c with the windchill the steam freezes and a thick layer of ice start to form on my lenses.

My second mistake, my glasses are metal framed. So as the steam formed into ice on my glasses, it is also caused them to literally stick to my face! I don’t think it helps that my nose bridge is pretty much non-existent. I am Asian after all and I accept that I have flat face and a flat nose. But in this kind unbearable, extreme cold, metal framed glasses that sit snug against a flat face instead of resting nicely on a nose bridge is just a bad idea!

Now remember, this is only a 5 to 6 block walk and all of this managed to happen within block number 2 of the walk! Needless to say, by the time we arrived at block 3, where Dean felt the need to stop and take a photo of us in front of a sign that displayed the temperature, I could not see anything! I could not see through my glasses nor could I see peering over the lenses because my vision is so crappy. I’m literally as blind as a bat! Good thing Dean was around to be my seeing-eye-person!

NOTE TO SELF: when in temperatures below -20c, wear contact lenses as glasses will freeze to your face.

Dancing Aurora in Yellowknife

2008-01-13T22:50:00.000-08:00

My co-worker Dean and I arrived in Yellowknife mid-afternoon and so far I have to say that I like this town. I know I have been here for less than 24 hrs and I am probably jumping the gun a bit in saying that. It was sunny and warm for this time of year at a mere -18c. I could be singing a different tune if it had been -40c. It's likely to get colder tomorrow so I guess I'll see how I feel tomorrow. But nonetheless, -18c is still somewhat cold with the windchill (maybe -23c or so today) if you aren't dressed appropriately. Your tongue would definitely stick to metal in this sort of weather as I quickly discovered. No, I did not purposely stick my tongue to a metal parking meter or anything like that! But rather, I have these special mitts that have a zipper along the side so you can slide your hand in-and-out just in case you need to use your fingers... you know for things like taking photos and such. Anyhow, I forgot that the zipper on my mitts are made of metal and when I attempted to use my mouth to open the zipper, my tongue froze to the zipper latch! I tore a small part of my tongue onto the zipper of my mitt! Ouch! *Note to self: do not use mouth on metal zippers!*

The trees here are short and watching from the plane during our descent, Yellowknife looked like snow and ice covered by fuzzy moss. Apparently as you head north toward the tree line, most of the trees are about 3 feet small. I would look like a giant at a staggering 4'9 1/2" next to those trees!

A Sunday night in Yellowknife seems to be fairly quiet. Dean and I decided to have dinner at a Vietnamese noodle joint and I'd have to say that it was the most expensive bowl of Pho I have ever had! When I was in Vietnam in June I paid the equivalent of $1-2 CND for a bowl of Pho with all the fixings - mint leaves, basil, bean sprouts, etc. Here in Yellowknife fresh herbs are hard to get and they are very expensive. So I ordered a bowl of Pho with beef balls and rare beef and it was $9.95 just for the noodles and beef! No fixings. Just a few chopped green onions and that was it. I couldn't even get beef flank or tendons as I would normally! Oh well.

After our less than exciting but very pricey bowls of Pho, we decide that we should walk around town and see if we can see the Aurora Borealis a.k.a. the Northern Lights. So we wander around the parking lot of the hotel and wander down the highway and low and behold we see a light stream of green light bending and curving in the sky. At first it was very faint but gets brighter from time to time. Nothing too spectacular because there was too much light pollution in the city. So we decide to head out on to a frozen lake to get a bit further away from the city lights. We tread through a foot or so of powdery snow on the lake and the Aurora Borealis look brighter. But still, I was not satisfied. Dean suggests we look for a cab to take us outside the city limits so we head back to the highway in hopes of finding a cab.

Within about 5 minutes from when we get to the highway, a cab drives by and I wave it down. The cabby is a Francophone named Gilles from Quebec City and he drives us out about 10-15 minutes outside of town. We pull off the side of the highway where it is dark and as we get out of the cab I see one of the most spectacular things of my life..... dancing ribbons of light across the night sky! Strings of green and some with hints of pink and red! And they do dance! They danced in waves and ripples, flashing red and green marching in and around the starlit sky. It was absolutely stunning and literally took my breath away for a moment. But after that brief breathless moment (most of you know that I can be quite chatty), I was overwhelmed with glee and felt deeply fortunate to have the opportunity see such a wonder of nature. All I kept saying was "This is beautiful! I can't believe how spectacular this is! This is fucking beautiful!"

Well, I'm off to bed as work awaits me in the morning. I hope the weather is nice tomorrow night as well. I want to see more of this amazing phenomenon and will take every chance I get to do it!

Psychological Immunity and the Price of Freedom

2007-12-30T15:53:00.000-08:00

For the past several months, I have been a reading machine. Ok, that is a slight exaggeration. Let's just say I have been reading a lot more than I usually do. And when I say "more than usual" that would be more than one book a year. In all seriousness, I have read maybe 5 - 6 books this year so that's a 500 - 600% increase in book reading! I pat myself on the back.

One of the books that kicked off my read-o-rama was "Stumbling on Happiness" by Daniel Gilbert. It is non-fiction and discusses a series of studies about predictors of happiness. Gilbert argues that our brains systematically misjudge what will make us happy. And these quirks in our cognition make humans very poor predictors of our own bliss. Essentially, he says that our assumptions about what will make us happy are often wrong.

Psychological Immunity

In Gilbert's study, people demonstrate they are not good at forecasting their responses to emotional incidents and tend to overestimate how long they will be unhappy following negative events. An interesting notion Gilbert writes about is premise of a "psychological immune system" which shelters people from the worst effect of their misfortune.

Most of us are not conscious of our psychological immune system for a couple of reasons. First, positive events can buffer the emotional impact of painful circumstances. And second, while under duress, people have an extraordinary ability to reflect on negative circumstances that happen to them in a positive manner. In a sense, it's a psychological defense mechanism that helps us cope.

Let's say you know about your imminent death. You will die in 30 days. How do you think you would handle such devastating news?

For me, I would feel absolutely destroyed. There are so many things I life I have yet to experience, people I have yet to meet and places I have yet to go to. After getting over the initial feeling of crushing devastation, I would think that I would not waste my precious 30 days wallowing in my own despair about the fact that I am going to die. This would be the ultimate opportunity to live. Not just live in the "breathing" sense but rather really LIVE. I would take the time to do all the things I have been to scared to do. Say the things I have been too afraid to say. And spend time with the people in my life that I truly love and care about. Why spend the last moments of your life a miserable bastard? So even though I would be facing death, I would try and make the experience as positive as possible.

I am not dying. Well, let me rephrase that seeing that we are all "technically" dying as we age. I do not have a terminal illness that I am aware of. What is holding me back from doing the things that I am afraid of right NOW? Why not live in the moment? "Carpe Diem" so they say?

The Price of Freedom

According to Gilbert, it is not only intense suffering that can trigger our psychological immune system but other triggers such as inescapability. Gilbert says, "When the experience we are having is not the experience we want to be having, our first reaction is to go out and have a different one, which is why we return unsatisfactory rental cars, check out of bad hotels, and stop hanging out with people who pick their noses in public. It is only when we cannot change the experience that we look for ways to change our view of the experience, which is why we love the clunker in the drive way, the shabby cabin that's been in the family for years, and Uncle Sheldon despite his predilection for nasal spelunking."

In today's day and age we have an unbelievable amount of choice. Globalization and technology has enabled and expanded our ability to choose. But is the freedom of choice necessarily a good thing?

In order to explore happiness in relation to choice, Gilbert conducted a photography course where the participants shot and developed photos and given the opportunity to take one home. Half of the participants were told they would be allowed to later change their minds about which photo to keep, the "escapable" group, and the other half were told that their choices would be final, the "inescapable" group.

Which group do you think were happier with their choice of photo, the "escapable" group or the "inescapable" group?

The results suggest the "escapable" group was more likely to regret their decisions and like their photographs less than those in the "inescapable" group. Even more interesting is that when a new group of participants were asked to predict if their contentment with their choice of photograph would be influenced by whether or not their choice was irrevocable or not, these participants predicted that escapability would not influence their satisfaction. Even though the study shows that inescapable and irrevocable circumstances trigger our psychological defenses to have a more positive view on those circumstances, we are not able to foresee that this will happen. And because we fail to recognize that inescapability will trigger our psychological defenses, we can end up making painful mistakes that jeopardize our happiness.

Now let's take this notion of choice one step further. A new group of photography participants were asked whether they would prefer to have or not to have the choice to change their minds about which photograph to keep and the majority preferred to have the opportunity to choose. Thus, the vast majority preferred to take a class where they would ultimately be unhappy with the outcome; a photograph they would be dissatisfied with.

"These results show how our penchant for freedom, opportunity, choice and leaving our bridges unburned can backfire," says Gilbert. "None of us likes the feeling of being trapped, so when given the opportunity to escape our commitments, we shrug and say, 'Sure, why not? How could it hurt to have a little extra freedom?' This study shows how it can hurt."

There is such a thing as too much choice. People believe choice is going to be good for them, when in fact it's not always. So the moral of the story... once you choose something, commit to it and don't look back otherwise you may end up with buyers remorse.

The Anti-Christ: SATAN CLAUS HIMSELF

2007-12-25T22:33:00.000-08:00

Well it’s Christmas Day and it’s that time of year you spend with family and friends. Now, I personally have not been a fan of Christmas. You can call me the Anti-Christ really. Now before all of your Christmas soldiers and elves get on my case about the “meaning of Christmas”, let me explain myself. Here are the reasons I dislike Christmas:

I truly despise the premise that you MUST buy gifts. Yes, gifts are nice and I hear that it is better to give than to receive. Personally, I will give a gift to someone if I happen to see something that I know a friend or family member would like. It doesn’t necessarily have to be at Christmas or at a birthday or any special occasion really. It’s a gift just because. I saw it and I thought they should have it.

I hate Christmas stress. As people bustle around getting ready for the holidays things get frantic and people are CRAZY. It’s like going through an entire month feeling like it’s a full moon. And everyone who is anyone knows that all the crazies come out of the woodwork during a full moon. The shopping malls and grocery stores are mayhem and there’s gridlock in parking lots. You’d think that there would be more Christmas “cheer” but from what I have experienced, people are frazzled and stressed. I can be certain to say that there have been more altercations at the mall in December that at any other time of year.

I despise formal seating at Christmas dinner. Once again I don’t mean to offend those who do this but I think having formal seating at a family Christmas dinner is completely ridiculous. Adding any sort of formality to an occasion that is supposed to be joyous and festive takes all of the fun out of it. Ok, I do understand that someone has to sit next to crazy Aunt May who takes her dentures out and neatly places in on her napkin after pumpkin pie or the bozo drunk Uncle Martin who brings a new and younger girlfriend each year I hopes that the family doesn’t suspect he’s a homo despite the fact that we are all just begging for him to come out of the closet already!! I’m sure the seating can work itself out without the table place tags!

The number one reason I’m bitter about Christmas probably stems from my own childhood. I honestly believe that Christmas, as known by North Americans, was ruined because my parents are ESL and didn’t fully understand the “Christmas Culture” and the importance of Santa to a young child. You see, as my parents were still learning to speak, read and write in English and naturally they made mistakes. I would have to say that their most crucial mistake ruined Christmas for me forever. How would you feel getting up early Christmas morning only to find that you have received gifts from SATAN? That’s right around the age of 6 or so I think our gifts were wrapped and left by the fire place with tags that said “Marry Cristmus From Satan”. Obviously, there was no Santa or Satan for that matter… it was just my ESL parents who didn’t have spell check in 1981. So at the innocent age of 6, my Christmas spirit was shattered and all faith in the holiday disappeared that day when I found out Santa was a fake.

Life Explained on Film

2007-12-16T02:13:00.001-08:00

As usual it's after 2 am and I cannot sleep. What is one to do when one has insomnia??? Me, I either read, watch a movie or surf the net. Tonight, I decided to surf the net and I came across a completely ridiculous website call videojug - life explained on film. This site provides video instructions on life with footage on issues such as "How to avoid trapped arm whilst cuddling in bed", "Be the perfect boyfriend", "Be the perfect girlfriend" and "How to break up the right way". This site provides instructions on life but not only about relationships but other topics such as "How To Do A Backhand Drive In Table Tennis", "A Girl's Guide To Looking Good Naked" and "How to Prepare For a trip into the Wild". Anyhow visit http://www.videojug.com/ and see the various things explained in life. Leave it to the Brits to come up with this.....

Radical Honesty "I Think You're Fat"

2007-12-11T16:29:00.000-08:00

I mentioned that I would continue with my blog in July.... it is now December and I have posted nothing. Evidently, I am completely unreliable and have an excuse for everything. What can I say, my pursuit of life has been all consuming. Enough said, I'm back from my five month hiatus.

I know there are many bloggers out there that have much more interesting things to say and some that are much stronger writers than I. I don't really care that they are better than me; that is to be expected. Their is always a smarter, better, beautiful, more reliable version of ourselves being born every second of the day. I blog to express my thoughts and ideas.... and of course to share them with those who care enough to read my on going droning. Hopefully I won't drone on too much. I am sure that there will be times where my perspective is completely ludicrous and you will find yourself saying “what the f*** is this nut job talking about? She’s a complete ass”. And that is fine with me. But I hope that there will be times where you will think, “Hah, I never really thought of it that way” or “wow, that is SO very true”. And I am fine with that too. OK enough about me... I sound like a narcissist.

Idioms

I may sound like a complete and utter skeptic but I have come to the realization that life is not about the pursuit of happiness (happiness is overrated anyhow) but rather the pursuit is life itself. I know, this makes no sense. Well not yet anyway.

This thought came to me when I came across a few idioms. One of which is "Happy as a clam." In it's full form the idiom is "Happy as a clam in mud at high tide" meaning a clam is happy because it cannot be dug up and eaten.

If happiness is that simple we'd all be clams. I understand happiness as segments and moments in our lives. Events and experiences that evoke the feeling of happiness. If that is the context of happiness, then happiness is essentially not sustainable. We can pursue moments of happiness but life as happiness cannot truly exist. If life is the pursuit of happiness then I believe we'd be chasing a red herring. Also another idiom! (Just in case it's not obvious - a red herring is something that takes people's attention away from the main subject being talked or written about). In the pursuit of life we will experience happiness but we will also experience sorrow, anger, rage, guilt, love, regret and a whole gamut of human emotion. For me, life is about experiences, how we handle and react to our experiences and how we continue on to the next experience. Hence the pursuit of life.

Here's another idiom, "Honesty is the best policy" which obviously means that it is best to be honest. We all know that is NOT true. The truth hurts sometimes so we censor that truth to spare each other unnecessary pain. I recently read an entertaining article about a movement called "Radical Honesty". Here's a link to the article "I Think You're Fat" by AJ Jacobs. The Radical Honesty movement was founded by Brad Blanton, a sixty-six-year-old Virginia-based psychotherapist who believes that everybody would be happier if we just stopped lying. Tell the truth, all the time. Have a read... it's an interesting concept... ludicrous in many ways but interesting.

Continuing the Blog - Post Vietnam

2007-07-23T23:37:00.000-07:00

Ok, I have been back in Vancouver for over a month now and I have to say I miss writing and blogging. Who knew that would happen? Surely I would not have predicted that.

Anyhow, I have decided to continue writing just about everyday things just for the heck of it! I may not be Pulitzer Prize winning writer or anything even remotely close to it but what the hell. I'm doing it for me... call me a self-centered ego maniac if you must but I gotta do what I gotta do.

Now that I have announced my new venture in a public forum such as this, I really have nothing very interesting to add today. So toodle-loo until the next thing pops into my head.

Hong Kong Shopping, Foot Spas & Bums

2007-06-18T04:11:00.000-07:00

Today is our last day in Hong Kong and we're heading back home tomorrow on a 4:30 pm flight. Seeing that we gain an hour coming back we should be back in the early afternoon Vancouver time on Tuesday. I can't believe I'm back at work on Wednesday! Eeek! I haven't checked any email from work since we left Saigon. So I'm fearing the "you have 2000 emails"!

Well what can I tell you about Hong Kong.... it's quite spectacular. If you like shopping either for clothes, shoes, purses or electronics this is the mecca of all meccas. Actually I think you can buy just about anything you want here. This is consumerism at it's finest. This place is made of money. I have never seen so many people that are so brand conscience. When I asked the hotel concierge about where to go shopping, he asked me what brands and what "level" of items I wanted to buy. Of course when I told him that I wanted to go and bargain in the market I got a funny look from him.... like "oh, a low level shopper I see. Why the hell are you staying at the 4 star hotel in Kowloon???"

I actually had to restrain myself from buying this very cool PDA cell phone that had all the features including a touch screen display, 2 GB MP3, 3 megapixal camera, WIFI and a bunch of other bells and whistles. The O2 Atom Life.... too bad it was $850!!! But man is it cool. I really want it. But alas I have damn property taxes to pay to I'm going to do the responsible thing and pass on this awesome purchase. *sigh of sadness*.... oh the joys of being a responsible adult.

Tai Pan Spa Beauty and Foot Spa

We also stopped by the best spa I have ever been to. My brother's girlfriend, Carmen, hooked us up with a foot spa today threw her family connections. It was a very cool funky place at 83b Nathan Road in Tsim Shat Tsui. It was awesome! If any of you are ever in Hong Kong, I highly recommend. There's even a glass floor full of Koi fish below your feet when you walk in!

Bums - aka Gluteus Maximus

Well what can I say.... perhaps gluteus minimus??? Just an observation here in Hong Kong.... it's not a very bummy place. Colin first noticed this and began pointing out the myriad of flat bums in this town. You know how when someone tells you something and it sticks in your head like a bad jingle... well this happened to me. Every where I turned I kept noticing the flat glute syndrome. I know, I know it's so awful and critical of me but I just found it odd. It's like back and then legs.... the butt was completely bypassed! And well "I like big butts and I cannot lie....!" Hah. Ok enough of my butt talk.

Hong Kong

2007-06-17T09:17:00.001-07:00

It's getting late so I thought I would just post a few pictures up and write a little bit more later about Hong Kong. So far I love it here! It's very cosmopolitan and modern. Things seem to tick like clock-work; very efficient! I would actually consider moving here to work. I'll write more later.....

The Vietnamese People

2007-06-17T08:48:00.000-07:00

Well our tour of Vietnam came to and end on Saturday. I'm feeling a bit sad about leaving. I feel that I understand so much more about my heritage, my family and myself. My Vietnamese has definitely improved and I'm very comfortable speaking it now. I actually kind of miss it now that we are in Hong Kong and I have no idea how to speak Cantonese.

I'd have to say the people in Vietnam are generally very warm people (especially in the South). The Vietnamese people I have met here are unbelievably hard working and care greatly about their friends and family. I'm not just saying this because I'm Vietnamese. In fact, growing up I was embarrassed to tell people I was Vietnamese. There was just so much bad press out there about the war and later on in the 80's and 90's more negative press about the Vietnamese youth gangs and their ruthless killings. I was also embarrassed by the idea that we had come to Canada as political refugees. I was just easier for me as a kid to tell people I was Chinese. I guess I didn't really understand the risks my parents had taken to give us (their kids) freedom. Freedom of choice about what we wanted to do with our lives and how we want to live our lives. I'm sure I'd be working in the Saigon market today, with overly tanned, leathery skin and big buck-teeth if my parents had not made the choice to leave Vietnam during the Fall of Saigon. Who would have guessed it that their 3 kids are working professionals today (a tax lawyer, a senior director and an IT guru). It was probably the greatest gift they could give us. I just hope that I can live up to the opportunity they gave me. (No pressure really!?!?)

For the first time, after experiencing the culture here, I am very proud to say that I am Vietnamese. I know I must sound completely ridiculous but I wish that I had come to this realization sooner. But I guess it's better late than never.

Hanoi & Halong Bay

2007-06-17T07:46:00.000-07:00

Hanoi

Visiting the North is very intriguing to me. You see, neither of my parents have been to Hanoi as I feel they both still harbour some resentment for what the North stands for.... loss of freedom and a communist regime. I guess if you were shot down 3 times by the Viet-Cong, you may likely find it hard to forgive and forget. For those of you who don't know, my father was a helicopter pilot in the South Vietnamese Army and flew as a gunship pilot behind enemy lines. So as you can probably understand, I received a very biased view of the North growing up.

However, I have had a handful of friends visit Vietnam recently before my trip here and I have heard some really great things about Hanoi. So my objective was to remain very open to Hanoi.

Hanoi is the second largest city in Vietnam with just over 4 million people; just half of the population of Saigon. The traffic in Hanoi didn't seem to be as crazy as in Saigon and there seemed to be a lot more cars in comparison to the sea of motorcycles in Saigon. Hanoi is also the capital of Vietnam. Before Hanoi was declared Vietnam's capital, Hue was the capital and the Emperors and Kings of Vietnam ruled from the Forbidden City (the Citadel).

Well, when we got there we visited a few museums and went to the Waterpuppet show. Fairly standard tourist things to do. However, there was one thing I found to be very interesting. Just about everyone we spoke to, at the museum, the shops in and around Hanoi and on the streets, they all seemed to be a little bit sad. I'm not sure if it was just me noticing this because I can understand what they are saying and talking about but it was just a feeling I got being in Hanoi. There also seemed to be a sense of "fear" if they were to disobey the government or tick off someone important in the government or military you'd get in some deep trouble. Most of the young folk we talked to told us that if you want to have some fun and get yourself a good paying job, go to Saigon. One fellow in a gift shop told us that his friend went to Saigon and he loves it there, and that one day he will save up enough money to go to Saigon too. Our tour guide also told us that business owners prefer to open shop in Saigon instead of Hanoi. He says that most of the city is shut down after 11 pm. If you are a restaurant owner or bar owner, you will surely make more money in the South.

I guess it was just interesting to see that some of the people in the North wanted to go to the South. When we first arrived in Saigon there was a very positive energy in the city and we even said that it didn't seem like we were in a communist country. Now being up North, you can really get a sense of communism. There was much more communist propaganda around and more military presence in Hanoi.

Overall, our experience in Hanoi wasn't that great. The sidewalks were hard to walk along because everyone and their dog parked their motorcycles on the sidewalks. There were also A LOT of cockroaches. There are cockroaches everywhere in Vietnam but we were fortunate that we didn't see too many. That was until we got to Hanoi. There were 3 very large roaches in our hotel room. It was disgusting! I don't like killing roaches.

And then after the gong show at the airport and no one really wanting to help us out it was a real difference that what we had experienced in Saigon. We had run into airline problems when we were flying from Saigon to Dalat. Vietnam Airlines would not issue Tricia boarding pass because the name on the ticket did not match her name exactly on her passport (Patricia instead of Tricia). Anyhow, people in the airport jumped in to help us out. Even used their own cell phones to call our tour company in Hanoi to let them know we were having problems. We tried to give the man who made phone calls on our behalf a tip and he wouldn't take it. He just wished us luck on the rest of our trip and he hoped that we enjoy Vietnam. What a contrast from the North. I hate to say it but my parents were right! There wasn't much to see in Hanoi.

Halong Bay

Halong Bay was spectacular and I would say that it was a highlight in our trip. Even though the area is far from being secluded, it was simply magical. We stay overnight on a boat, went swimming in the jade green waters of the bay and even enjoyed some kayaking into a cave and an into an enclosed area of the bay. It seemed like something out of the movies or survivor our something of the sort. I just couldn't get enough of the place and I wished I could stay in the bay for at least a few more days. It was breathtaking.

Gong Show in Hue & Hanoi!

2007-06-17T03:16:00.000-07:00

Ok, I gone an added some pictures to my past posts now that I have been able to download some photos.

Vietnam Airlines Sucks Balls!

Ok, I'm starting off with some negative comments about Vietnam Airlines. And it is this..... they simply SUCK. They have no idea what customer service means. Bunch of communists I think!

Here's a play by play of bad domestic flights in Vietnam:

Arrive at the airport in Hue and we are told that the flight has been cancelled and we need to come back in the morning.

We are told that the delay flying into Hanoi is due to rain (I smell BULLSHIT here!) Flights don't get cancelled due to rain. It rains all the time in Vancouver and flights don't get cancelled.

We later find out that the flight was cancelled because there are simply not enough passengers to fly. Great.

Now I need to figure out where we are staying for the night in Hue. Vietnam Airlines says that they will put us up in a shitty hotel. Even better. A roach motel.

I get on the phone with the Vietnamese tour company we booked with and after much yelling with Vietnam Airlines and the tour company we are finally allowed to go back to the hotel we had been staying in. They would split the costs. BUT wait.... our driver is now threatening to leave us behind because according to him his contract to drive us is done.

So Colin decides to just load our bags into his van and sit in there until he drives us back. It was very tense now.

I had to call the tour company again to make sure that the driver was coming back in the morning to take us to the airport again. Finally the tour company agrees to pay the driver for the additional driving due to the cancelled flight.

Finally issue #1 resolved with Vietnam Airlines.

Issue #2 with Vietnam Airlines

I'll tell you more about our lovely boat trip at Halong Bay and visit in Hanoi in another post but this topic is about our gong show departure from Hanoi.

First, I'd have to say my fear about the Northern accent wasn't as bad as I thought. BUT it was still very tough. Just about everything is pronounced with "v" and "z" sounds. I have to ask people to repeat themselves all the time or tell them that I have no idea what they are saying because I'm not used to listening to the accent. By far, listening to the Vietnamese in middle Vietnam (Hue area) was much tougher!

So after our lovely trip to Halong Bay we drive back to Hanoi to fly to Saigon in order to catch our flight to Hong Kong. Our flight was set to leave at 7:00 am but of course when we arrive at the airport we run into more problems. I really shouldn't be surprised. It turns out that my ticket as well as Colin's, Kasztan's and Brian's tickets had been cancelled and the only person getting a boarding pass was Colin's mom Trish. WHAT THE F***! So I asked the ticket agent what the hell happened and she gave me some bullshit about not reconfirming our flight 72 hours in advance of departure. It's 5:40 am and Vietnam Airlines is telling us that we are S.O.L.

Talking to the airline staff was completely useless. From what they were telling me, the flight to Saigon was full and they just kept asking us to wait to see what they could do. Time was ticking and the time is now 6:20 am. I was about to lose it at this point. I stopped waiting and leaned over the counter and firmly told the ticket agent to get her manager out here NOW. I told her that we were getting on this flight in order to make our connections in Saigon and I didn't care who she needed to bump to get us on. Finally they put us on priority stand-by and we rushed to the baggage counter to check our bags. Of course as luck would have it, one of our bags is red flagged at security! Great! Turns out it was the snake & scorpion wine I had bought.

It's now 6:45 am and our flight was leaving in 15 minutes! The ticket agent was printing boarding passes for us to rush to the gate. But as Murphy's Law would have it the last and final boarding pass that she needed to print kept getting jammed in the machine. Shit, I just wanted to reach over the counter and give her feeble body a good shake.

Finally we got our boarding passes and ran to the gate. They find a few seats for us and we are finally on our way to Saigon! I'd have to say that speaking Vietnamese really helped us out.... and of course being a very squeaky wheel helps too!

Off to Hanoi

2007-06-12T04:00:00.000-07:00

Ok, it's 6:00 pm in Hue and we leave for the airport at 7:30 pm to go to Hanoi.

So that accents here is Hue have been very, very hard to understand. It's like trying to listen to a person with a very heavy Scottish accent. Anyhow off the Hanoi for more language challenges!

Here's the story behind my fear of the Northern accent...

When I was about 11 or 12 years old, I remember my mom took me to a friends place for a dinner get together. Of course, being a little kid, little old Vietnamese ladies love kids! I was the fortunate one seated next to this 70 year old lady from North Vietnam. She talked to me all through dinner. It seemed like hours of torture to me. I hardly said a word to her because I had no idea what she was saying. I just kept nodding my head smiling and saying yes to her. I had no idea what I had agreed to. Well I guess I wasn't until she asked me a question I could not respond with a simple yes or nod. She asked me the same questions again and I responded with nothing but a nod. I could see she was frustrated. Of course, my mom comes by now and sees that this little old lady is upset with me. My mom scolded me and told me I was being so rude ignoring this lady. My mom kept asking me why I was refusing to talk to her. My mom kept pressuring me to respond to her. I couldn't talk the spectacle anymore and I finally came out with it and told everyone at the dinner table that I had no idea what she had been talking about for the past hour because of her accent! How embarrassing. Thank god most of the adults just laughed. I was mortified. I still live with this fear today that I'm going to make an ass of myself. Gulp. Off to the North I go to face my language fear. :)

Hue

2007-06-11T23:32:00.000-07:00

We have been in Hue for the past couple of days. It's a bit cooler now at 36c. Much better than 40c!

Last night there was an amazing lightening storm. It lit up the night sky like it was Christmas! No rain, just big bolts of lightening flashing and dancing along the horizon.

This morning we headed off the the Forbidden City (the Citadel) where the former Kings and Emperors of Vietnam used to rule. Hue used to be the capital of Vietnam years ago. Much of the Forbidden City was destroyed by US bombers where the Viet-Cong were hiding out during the war. It's a shame to see so much history destroyed in one fowl swoop. We also stop in at another pagoda where the monk who had burned himself in Saigon in 1963 to protest Diem (the former Catholic President of South Vietnam) was from. The car in the back ground is still at that pagoda in Hue today. It is believed by some (conspiracy theory) that Diem was put into power by the Americans. Given that 85% of the country is Buddhist, it seems silly (maybe even stupid) to have a Catholic President.

Bloody Hot in Hoi An

2007-06-10T08:20:00.000-07:00

We've been in Hoi An for the past couple of days and it's bloody freakin' hot here. It must be hotter than Hell (maybe I'll find out one day how hot hell really is!). I will never EVER complain about heat again after melting this afternoon. It was just over 40c today and I thought I was going to slit my own throat, delirious from the heat. I know ladies like to say they have a "glow" when they perspire but holy shit there was no glow here! I've been sweating like a mofo.... no "glow" it's more like a waterfall of nasty sweat! It's horrible. No wonder there aren't really any obese people in Vietnam... it's too hot to eat and all you drink is water all day. I think I must have gone through 5 litres of water today and I probably sweat it all out! Well the good thing about this is that I think I've lost some weight! Well maybe it's just water weight but I'll take it!

Hoi An is the garment district of Vietnam. Many of the labour here are quite skilled in tailoring, embroidery, wood crafts and stone carvings. Colin & I both had suits tailored here. It was relatively inexpensive. Colin went to town on the clothes thing. I tell you, for a guy this man loves to shop! He's coming home with 3 suits, 11 long sleeve shirts, 5 short sleeve shirts, 2 sport coats and 4 pairs of slacks. Crazy! I was much more conservative and had 3 suits made and a couple of summer dresses. The tailor we went to was very nice. Seeing that it's the garment district we've gotten the sense that there are a lot of gay men in this area. Personally I think the master tailor we were working with has a "thing" for Colin. While we were haggling over the price of Colin's gianormis order, the tailor was massaging his shoulders!!! Hah!

We also had a guided tour of the Hoi An today. Our guide, Vu, is from Hue (middle Vietnam) and holy-hannah is his accent difficult to make out! Speaking to him in Vietnamese was definitely tough. People in from Hue tend to speak Vietnamese with a very heavy sound. I know this sounds horrible but it's like a heavy, constipated pronunciation. It's really the only way I can think of decribing the difference. Just when I thought my Vietnamese is virtually fluent, we get a guide with an accent! I can't wait to try my hand at what things will be like when we get to Hanoi with yet another accent to try and figure out. Well I guess life is not without it's challenges!

Our tour included a brief history about the region and how the Japanese and Chinese have a strong influence here. We cycled all around town in these old rusty bikes and also peddled ourselves down to the beach at dusk. The beach was packed! It's funny here. You can head to the beach with nothing but yourselves and there are vendors there with mats you can rent and sit on and cold beers in hand, ready to serve you! You just can't get that at home!

So that's really all the excitement from the past 2 days - buying tailor made clothes and watching gay men hit on Colin. It's been a slice. :) Tomorrow we head out to Hue early in the morning at 7 am so I should hit the hay now.

P.S. - Mom, your warning about not drinking the snake & scorpion "rum" was too little too late. I've already had some. Sorry mamma. :)

Toothpicks, Snorkeling, Shopping and my Vietnamese

2007-06-08T06:38:00.000-07:00

Ok so today I am feeling a bit better. My 48 hour fever broke last night and now it's like having a cold again. It was a weird fever. My body didn't ache at all; I was just burning up like the fiery pit of hell. Now I'm just congested and I sound like a Vietnamese frog-man.... err women I guess. I'm afraid I'm going to lose my voice so I've been drinking lemon juice like there's no tomorrow.

Anyhoodles, enough about my ailments. I'm here today to talk about toothpicks, snorkeling, shopping and my Vietnamese.

Toothpicks

Ok, here is an interesting observation. People in Vietnam really like their toothpicks. Anytime you order a meal here they bring toothpicks to your table. It doesn't matter whether your at eating at a street vendor or a high end restaurant, you get a small delivery of toothpicks when you finish your meal.

I find this amusing because now I understand my Dad a little bit better. After meals at home he like to use his toothpicks. Of course, first he uses it to pick any bits of food left in his teeth but then he moves to chewing on it. I have always found his "thing" for toothpicks bizzaro. He even performs little magic tricks with his toothpicks; "The Magic Jumping Toothpick". This is where a toothpick will miraculously jump into the air without any sudden movements from his hand. It just leaps out of the palm of his hand!

So for me... mystery solved! ... about my Dad and his toothpicks! It's just something Vietnamese people do! I guess he's not so strange after all!

Snorkeling

Today we took a boat trip out to one of the 29 bays in Nha Trang to go snorkeling. I was a bit worried considering I wasn't feeling so well. I was also feeling a bit apprehensive about snorkeling without fins. They tour boat only provided snorkel masks and the rest was up to us. Well, I wouldn't exactly call myself a strong swimmer. Actually, to tell you the truth, I have a great fear of drowning. Nonetheless, I jumped in the bay anyway. I figured if I was going to drown at least it was going to be somewhere beautiful! But as it turns out, I'm such a sucky swimmer after all. The coral in Nha Trang is the most beautiful coral I have ever seen. I've snorkel and dove in the Dominican, various areas in the Caribbean, Mexico and Hawaii and I'd have to say that the coral here is second to none. There was so much variety of coral and they had such vivid and lush colours of red, hot pink, electric purple, glowing lime green and deep liquid blues. It was utterly amazing! I think I was so mesmerized with the sea life that I completely forgot about my fear of drowning into the abyss.

Shopping

So today we did a little bit of shopping. I was getting sick and tired of wearing my clown clothes so we headed to the market. Colin was on a quest to find a few nice shirts that would actually fit him. And I was frankly looking for anything matching.

I eventually found a shop where some of the tops and bottoms looked stylish yet not too pricey. I tried on a few shirts but low and behold, my build is too BIG for the clothes! Craziness. I guess being a size 2/size 4 at home is too big here! So I moved on to the next shop. I eventually found clothes that fit. I even bought a couple pairs of jeans. And get this.... (this is the most exciting part for me)... I don't have to hem my pants!!!! Hooray! I tell you, I don't often buy too many pant back home because I hate having to put in the time to get them hemmed. That's why I've been so happy that capris had come back into style. Anyhow... that was my little moment of glee!

Colin on the other hand had a much tougher time shopping. First of all, when he walked into a store on his own they merchants immediately charged him the "tourist" price. So we came up with a way where I would go into a store first ask about the prices and then he would come in and look at the shirts. The prices I can get are half of what they offer Colin! Sneaky little buggers!

My Vietnamese

I'm finding that my Vietnamese is getting better and better each day that I am here. It's really strange to me that I can understand everything going on around me. Several of my cousin mentioned to me that I sound a lot like my mom when I speak in Vietnamese. Well I guess any idea that I was adopted is out the window! I know I'm going to have a tougher time when we go up North to Hanoi. Their accents are different there so I'm crossing my fingers. Well I've go to go because I'm getting kicked out of the business centre at the hotel. Toodles and I hope to have another up date soon.

Sick as a Dog

2007-06-07T04:44:00.000-07:00

OK, so yesterday I felt like a bit of a cold coming on and well I've gone into a full blown fever/flu. It's horrible because we've finally made it to the beach resort and I'm sick. Crappy.

Last night I had a serious fever and I thought to myself... this is it I'm done for. Ok, ok, that's a bit dramatic. My fever is coming back just as I'm typing this blog. I feel a bit delirious. Yesterday we rented bikes in Dalat City and I was so sick that I dropped my bike. Scary. Oh well, maybe I'll try again when I'm feeling a bit better.

The traffic here is really tough. Traffic signs, lights and lines on the road are just mere suggestions. People will pull up right on to the side walk. I've also never heard so much honking in my life. Even when we're heading off to bed I can hear "beep, beep, honk, honk, toot, toot" ... it's never ending. At least here in Nha Trang (beach area) the traffic isn't as brutal as it is in Saigon. Crossing the road in Saigon is a real art. You have to move around predictably so you don't get run over. If you dart about here and there you'll surely get smoked by the pretty lady carrying a load of chickens and tropical fruit.

We're going to visit a group of islands around Nha Trang tomorrow and hopefully doing some snorkeling. I hope I can kick this bug by tomorrow morning otherwise I might be yakking off the side of the boat. Well at least if I do more fish will come around! I know, I know that's really gross but I'm trying to stay positive here.

Ok, I should head off to bed early and rest up. This dang fever... curses!

Saigon, Chau Doc & Toliets/Showers

2007-06-05T20:11:00.000-07:00

Ok... this one is going to be a long one since we've been traveling for a few days and I have a lot to write about. And... this may make your reading less enjoyable if you are a visual person because I don't have any pictures to upload. Colin has the camera and I'm in Dalat City on my own today. I woke up with a cold so I feel horrible and I'm a big snot-monster. The rest of the group went for a hike up to Pinhatt Mountain. I'm a bit sad that I will be missing the mountain hike but I need to rest up and keep myself healthy for the beach in Nha Trang tomorrow. The landscape here in Dalat reminds me of home (Vancouver). The air is cool, it's mountainous and there are dense pine tree forests here. You may want to grab a cup of joe and maybe a snack if you're in for a lengthy story. I'll do my best to keep it interesting with splashes of humour here and there.

Saigon

So after the gong-show of Trish & Brian's arrival to Saigon (Colin's parents), our city tour begins. The traffic in Saigon is crazy. I've never seen anything like it. There are 8.2 million people in Saigon and over 3 million motorcycles. Originally the city had been designed for 2.0 million people so you can image the congestion. Saigon is a very popular place, especially among the young folk. There is much opportunity to find jobs and the pace is very fast and exciting. The women in Saigon are very stylish (must be where I got my style from ;) ). You see the lady's dressed in very feminine clothes with beautiful and intricate beading riding in the motorcycles around town. It's very sexy!

I guess I didn't realize that the people (well at least the women) would be so well dressed here so I feel out of place. I didn't exactly pack anything nice. Not even remotely nice. Well I figured I needed to be comfortable and when you trvel it's not a fashion show. BUT needless to say, I have packed some really god aweful outfits for myself. Really, I look like a clown in mismatched tops, pants and shorts. I must have been on crack when I packed. It must have been packing all the Metamucil that threw me off my game. For example, today I am wearing an army green tank top with red board shorts. I look like a Christmas elf! Anyone want to sit on Santa's lap?!?!? Really though, I've been dressed in clown clothes this whole trip. Oh well, this will give me a good excuse to go shopping!

On the Road to Chau Doc

On Sunday we set off for a 3 hour drive, a couple of ferry rides and a boat ride into Chau Doc in the Mekong Delta. The main industry in this region is rice farming. Yes that's right folks... we're finally visiting the rice paddy! It is mostly women and some children who work in the rice fields. The Vietnamese people know that their women here are very hard working and take on all sorts of labour including being merchants and running their day to day house hold. Someone once told me a story of a pregnant women working in the rice paddy. She was having contractions and poof... out popped her baby! She wrapped up her new little bundle of joy, strapped her baby on to her and continued to work the rest of the day! Ok, ok so the story is somewhat extreme but that's the sense that you get when you meet these women. Let me be frank (... you can be Tom if you want - ok haa haa bad joke), most of the men I've seen in and around the city and in the country side don't seem to do much other than napping in their hammocks and playing a few hands of poker. The women seem to be running the show here!

Our boat trip down the Mekong Delta was a real eye opener. Although you can see that there is some wealth here because of the rice farming, there are also many people who seem to have nothing. Well, I shouldn't say nothing. They do have a lot in the sense of family. They live in stilt homes with palm leaf roofs along the delta and in the various canals and water ways of the delta. Even though it seems that the people here have so little in the sense of material possessions, the children are the happiest kids I have ever seen. You see them laughing a lot - chasing each other down up and down, swimming and splashing each other. So it makes you wonder if having more material things in our North American lives makes us less happy. Maybe we are filling our lives with "things" in an attempt to fulfill other needs we have yet to discover. Are we unable to reach this so called plain of discovery or enlightenment because of the materialistic culture we live in? Just some food for thought - is ignorance bliss or is knowledge power?

Toilets & Showers!!!

Ok, so I've covered some thoughts I've come across along the way so far. Here's my next thought... there aren't many toilets here. Of course the there are toilets in the more tourist areas but all in all I've seen more "ground squatting bowls" than toilets. This is what I call them, "squatters" - it's a ceramic toilet like bowl in the ground with little grooves along the sides where you place your feet. They do not flush but rather they drain like a sink. Well I was very proud of myself using these squatters. I've been able to refrain from gagging and just get to my business. I really felt like I was getting the hang of this squatting thing.... day in and day out I've been squatting without problems. I was coming close to say that I have mastered the "squat"! Well that was until yesterday when I started coughing and peed on my leg. Oh well, I guess that'll teach me for being cocky thinking I was the master of the squat.

Chau Doc boarders Cambodia so when we climbed up Sam Mountain we could see the vast landscape of rice paddys and the boarder into Cambodia. Being a boarder town, there is a definate transiant feel. The hotel we stayed at was far from the Ritz Carlton. Although I shouldn't complain, the bathroom had a sink and a toilet (no squatter) but not shower. Well, not exactly a shower. The whole bathroom was a shower! Right next to the toliet was a shower head. That's right people, you can shower and sit on the toliet at the same time if you really wanted to!

The Tour Begins

2007-06-02T06:15:00.000-07:00

Today was the first day of our 16 day tour of Vietnam. Colin's mom and step-dad arrived yesterday and of course not without excitment. We had arranged to have a driver from the tour company to pick them up at the airport but on their expected arrival time there was no one there. The driver called the hotel to see if we knew where they were... of course we had no idea. He had waited at the Saigon Airport for 2 1/2 hours and nothing. At this point, Colin thought that they probably missed their flight in Vancouver as they may have misjudged the time/day (flight was leaving at 2:55 am on a Thursday). So here we are, in Saigon expecting Colin's parents and they are no where to be found. The even harder part is that his parents are tech-phobics and likely did not have a cell phone with them and they probably could not figure out how to send/receive a text message. We thought to send them an email but knowing that they are far from being tech savvy, they probably have no idea how to check their Telus webmail. So we decided to text Billy (my brother) because he would have taken them to the airport and would know if they had missed their flight.

When we heard from Billy he said that as far as he knows he dropped them off 3 hours before their flight and assumed they we are their way. Ok so next thing... call Cathay Pacific. Of course, being in Vietnam things don't happen as quickly here. I go through the gammit of phone prompts from one selection to another and finally I get to flight inquiries and the pre-recorded message says that I need to fax the request and wait up to 24 hrs for a reply! Talk about A1 customer service... brutal.

So the next thing is to actually go down to the Cathay Pacific office. Thank goodness it's just across the street from our hotel. When we get there I asked the agent to look up Colin's parent's flight. She refused as it is a breech of passanger privacy. So I pleaded with her in Vietnamese and let her know that his parents were very, very old, they cannot speak Vietnamese and this was their first time visiting. I told her that I was worried they they would not be able to find their way to the hotel because the driver they were expecting to pick them up had already left for they day. Now how am I going to get two old, white, non-Vietnamese speaking people to the hotel without knowing when they would be arriving... if at all??? She hesistated for a little bit and I continued to beg. Finally she broke and gave me all the information I needed. As it turns out, they were in Hong Kong and their connecting flight was expected to arrive at 4:15 pm. I quickly called the tour guide to let him know what had happened. They had been bumped from their earlier flight and were delayed in Hong Kong for 7 hours.

Of course by now the tour guide did not have access to the van that would have picked them up. So I begged him (I'm doing a lot of begging as you can see) take his motorcycle and meet them at the airport. He could just put them into a cab and send them to the hotel.

So all in all, they arrived jet-lagged and tired but safe.

Buddhist Temple

2007-05-31T00:18:00.000-07:00

This morning my cousin Hoang came by the hotel to take us to the Buddhist temple where my grandparents' and great grandmother's tombs are. When we arrived, the temple smelled of a sweet jasmine incense. There was a slight haze from the myriad of incense burning throughout the various prayer rooms in the temple.

The head monk greeted us and let us know that we were very fortunate to be visiting today because it is a religious holiday and they would be having a special ceremony. He asked how my mother was and asked me to send along his greetings to her back home. Prior to the ceremonial prayers, I had perform my own prayers to pay my respects to my grandparents and my great grandmother. I did so by lighting 3 sticks of incense for each of them and in a bowing motion with my hands clasped together, bow 3 times in front of their tombs. I also had to light 3 sticks of incense, following the same bowing motion while standing and again by kneeling on the ground, in each of the prayer rooms to pay respects to Buddha and other ancestors.

When the monks began the ceremonial prayers, I found it to be very moving even though I really had no idea what was being said in the prayers. Much of it was in Vietnamese but it was sung in an odd echoing manner. It was almost trance-like. Among the prayers were sounds of bells, chimes and gongs along with variations of knocking and drumming. Nearing the end of the 45 minute ceremony, a Buddhist statue was placed into a vat of water lined with white flower petals. The monk blessed water and poured the water on to a statue signifying cleansing and purity.

Many of the people there also collected the water after the ceremony to either bring home to drink or to use it to soak and massage any ailments one may have as the water is believed to have healing abilities.

The monks asked us to join them for lunch afterwards and we had some great vegetarian soup (Bun Rieu) and dessert called Che Soy Nuoc (rice flour balls stuffed with sweet yellow bean in a sweet ginger and sugar syrup). It was quite tasty!

All in all, it was a very unique experience for me and I feel quite fortunate today.

Visit to Mom's Home in Khanh Hoi

2007-05-30T16:49:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we went to Khanh Hoi, just 10 minutes outside of Saigonto the house where my mom grew up. It was quit interesting for me.

When we arrived, I met my cousin Anh Hoang, a couple of uncles and a few more cousins for the first time. It was a bit odd at first because I didn't really know what to say to them. My Vietnamese has improved quite a bit. Hoang mentioned that I spoke Vietnamese much more clearly that he thought I would (yay me! - I knew I could do it). I thought one of my Uncles (Ong Mu) was quite funny. He told me that compared to Vietnamese standards, I'm still considered to be "short" here! Hah! Oh well, my dreams of being a tall or at least average height here has been short lived (no pun intended) :)

Apparently, they did some major renovations to the house in 1998 as the home used to have a bamboo, leafy type roof and dirt floors! It now has walls, tile floors and a real roof.

The visit was nice and we out for dinner at a place that sells Binh Xeo (a curried crepe stuffed with bean sprouts, shrimp and pork). It was very tasty!

Well it's 7:02 am and I need to get ready to go to the Buddhist temple to pay my respects to my grandparents.

Flight to Saigon

2007-05-30T01:25:00.000-07:00

Well we made it safely to Saigon after a torturous 17+ hours or so. I haven't really slept but I don't feel deliriously tired or anything yet.

Being diligent travellers, we arrived at the airport in Vancouver 3 hours early for our 2:55 am flight. But as luck would have it, out flight is delayed until 3:35 am. Ok, so it's only 40 mins. but an additional 40 mins. at the witching hour is utterly painful. I hoped to God that we are not seated next to any big snorers or cranky babies. I just wanted to crash out on the plane.... well not that kind of crash, I mean pass out and sleep.

It was a full flight (747) thankfully with no snorers near by. The crying baby thing was actually very hard to avoid. There was not just one little cranky baby on the flight but at least three! Needless to say, Colin & I hardly slept. Kasztan of course had passed out early on.... lucky bastard!

Anyhow after connecting through Hong Kong we are finally here in Saigon! It's bloody hot and the cab driver said that it's much cooler this week compared to last week. Yikes. Anyhow, that's about it so far. I have to connect with my cousin to give him and his family the lovely gifts we brought! Until next time.....

Day of Departure

2007-05-28T20:54:00.000-07:00

Ok... this is not so exciting just yet. I'm still packing and it's 10 minutes to 9 pm. So I'm taking a break to give a quick up date. Our flight leaves at 2:55 am so I a few more hours to cram a few more belongings into my backpack.

Of course, those of you who know my mom know that as a family member heading back to the homeland, one must also bring gifts. So I am bringing back gifts for some family. But, once again, if anyone is at all familiar with my family, the gifts are almost always odd. We don't give wine or cigars or anything of that sort. Some people may suggest I bring gifts of maple syrup, something distinctly Canadian. But no, that would be so un"Ho" like.

Let me share with you a tally of items I am bringing as gifts:

A LARGE grocery bag of full of Metamucil - in individual sized packs of course (yes I said Metamucil... I guess some people need to stay regular)

30 bottles of green liniment oil (I like to call it snake oil myself)

Two big Costco size bins of Cows candy (this one makes some sense to me as it's for my little cousins)

Anyhow, since I'm only bringing one pack, the Metamucil, snake oil and candy are really taking up a lot of space! But alas, I love my mamma and I need to take them with me. "I'm doing this for you Ma!"

Ok, enough procrastinating... I have to try and fit in some underwear amongst the Metamucil.

The day before Veitnam

2007-05-27T10:00:00.001-07:00

It's Sunday, May 27th and it's the day before we leave for Vietnam. I'm feeling somewhat anxious packing and anticipating what I may see and feel when I go "home". As some of you know, I was born in Saigon but have not been back since 1975 as my family left as refugees during the Fall of Saigon. Several people have asked about how I feel about seeing my homeland. And to tell you the truth, I have no idea. I may be overwhelmed with emotion but who's to say... all I know is that I am looking forward to learning more about my past, my heritage and a little more about myself. And of course, who wouldn't be excited to see 100 ducks heading to market, strapped to a back of a motorcycle or even a small family riding on one bike!

Nonetheless, I will try and be diligent and keep you all updated on our adventures!